4 February 2003
Veni, vidi, Visa
TO: Humongous Bank and Trust Company (Member F.D.I.C.)
Inasmuch as you rejected my credit application on the basis of eighteen-year-old information from some two-bit credit bureau not among the established Big Three, you've got a lot of damn gall to follow up the rejection letter with a copy of the same promotional offer.
I will make a point of determining the identities of all your subsidiaries and affiliates and avoiding as many of them as is humanly possible for the rest of my earthbound existence.