The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

17 February 2003

The fine print

Did you ever see one of those "Free Mumia!" posters? Did you ever read the tiny little type at the very bottom?

Me either. But this is what it should say under "Free Mumia":

"Limit one Mumia per customer while supplies last at participating locations. State and local taxes extra."

(Obviously neither Frank J. nor Scott Ott have anything to worry about.)

(Update, 11 pm: For the last hour, I've been deleting and reinstating this piece, on the semi-questionable premise that while I know I've heard this jape before, or some variation thereof, or its application to some other jailbird — um, Incarcero-American — I can't place it to save my life, and I don't want to grab up somebody else's credit if I can help it. So I decided, finally, to leave it up and hope that someone will read it and identify the source.)

Posted at 9:11 PM to Political Science Fiction


Like I say when I see the 'Free Tibet' bumper stickers- "one in every specially marked box".

Posted by: Bill H at 11:40 AM on 18 February 2003

The way I first saw it was on a sign outside
a synagogue. The sign originally said
" Save Soviet Jews" , to which some wise ass
added "win valuable prizes"

Posted by: Jon C. at 12:41 PM on 18 February 2003

As in: Save the Whales!
Collect the whole set!

Posted by: Frank G at 3:58 PM on 18 February 2003

It sounds like a line from "Deteriorata" (it's not), so I suggest a possible National Lampoon connection.

Posted by: Ken Summers at 8:37 PM on 18 February 2003

This reminds of the old "Jesus Saves" followed by "feeds to Gretzky... Gretzky shoots... SCORE!!!"

Not to be offensive to Christians. I am a Christian. And I believe that if Jesus were here today, He'd be a serious hockey fan. And a lot of hockey stars give thanks to Jesus.

Posted by: David Gulliver at 2:01 PM on 19 February 2003

Once upon a time, my .signature was, "Jesus Saves.... and takes half damage!"

Posted by: Aaron Baugher at 6:01 PM on 28 March 2003