The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

17 June 2004

Ladies and gentlemen, the Slobbovian ambassador

The real source of male slovenliness, says Andrew Sullivan, is women:

If women weren't so damn forgiving of slobbiness, if they weren't prepared to look for the diamond buried in the rough of a man's beer-belly, men might have to shape up a little. The only reason gay men are — on the whole — better turned out than straight men is because they have to appeal to other shallow, beauty-obsessed males to get laid, find a mate, etc. The corollary, of course, are lesbians. Now there are many glamorous lesbiterians, but even the most enthusiastic Sapphic-lover will have to concede that many are not exactly, shall we say, stylish. The reason? They don't have to be to attract other women; and since women find monogamy easier, they also slide into the I'm-married-so-what-the-hell-have-another-pretzel syndrome. When straight women really do insist on only dating hot guys, men will shape up. Until then, it's hopeless.

Unfortunately, it's not a diamond: it's a kidney stone.

Of course, I wouldn't have this problem if I didn't persist in falling for women who are so far out of my league it seems impossible we could be playing the same game.

(Update, 6:35 am, 18 June: Dawn Eden rakes Sullivan over the coals.)

Posted at 9:51 AM to Table for One


Andrew's just trying to ruin it for us breeding males.

Posted by: McGehee at 10:31 AM on 17 June 2004

A question for Andrew.

Shouldn't the closeted gay male be slovenly as a means of staying in the closet?

Rich

Posted by: Rich at 10:48 AM on 17 June 2004

Hmmm. Hadn't thought of that one.

Even from deep within the closet, though, there's still the desire to hook up, and that means an environmental cleanup of some sort, however temporary and/or desultory.

Posted by: CGHill at 11:35 AM on 17 June 2004

Then try for women in your league.

Posted by: hmm at 9:59 AM on 18 June 2004

What, are you nuts? They're even more depressing than I am.

Posted by: CGHill at 10:15 AM on 18 June 2004