Strange search-engine queries (16)

And what better way to start a week than with a collection of last week's weirder search strings?

florence henderson sans clothes:  Bringing up three very lovely girls does cut into the time for this sort of thing.

side effects of snap crackle and pop poster:  I suppose this guy is researching cereal killers.

how to make love on a table:  Hint: don't use the good china.

where to buy vibrators in hattiesburg, ms:  I suspect Sam's Club is out.

you can paint a turd gold:  Better use two coats.

What sex was triple crown winner Secretariat?  Would it help if I said he was hung like a horse?

faith hill almost nude:  "How bad do you want it?" asks Tim McGraw.

penis nv:  On the opposite side of the state from Pahrump, NV.

What did you have for breakfast this morning, carnation instant bitch?  Actually, it was a Pop-Tart. Not cherry, either.

British Toads with Hamburger:  And hold the mayo, too.

wrung official:  Oh, hell, let's wring them all.

why are there no models in coldwater creek catalogs:  Most of their customers are invisible, so they design their catalogs accordingly.

illuminati and Halle Berry:  Finally, an explanation for Catwoman.

Posted at 6:04 AM to You Asked For It