20 July 2006Shoe mathNo, it doesn't have anything to do with the Brannock Device. Let's say she says you've got, oh, eight inches on her:
Listen. The first time I was standing next to you, it was evening, so I was wearing dressy shoes. All my going-out shoes have about a 3 inch heel. Except my formal shoes, which are higher, but I wouldn't have been wearing any of those. And you were wearing normal inoffensive contemporary men's shoes, which would have had about a 1 inch heel, or we probably wouldn't even be speaking right now. So comparably, that nets me two additional inches. That aren't really mine. And even with the two inches, I probably only came up to the bottom of your nose. Bottom of the nose to the top of the head, probably about half a foot, plus the two inches I shouldn't have had. Eight inches. Give or take.
At least as accurate as the tape measure in my toolbox, and without making that bendy-metal SSPROING! noise either. Posted at 9:05 PM to Table for OneWow, I never knew that that device had a name! You have edified my morning. Posted by: Patti at 8:21 AM on 21 July 2006 |