The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

15 August 2006

Too good for you?

Jacqueline Passey is a "high-quality woman," and if you don't believe it, just ask her:

I know that sounds arrogant, but letís consider the facts:
  • Iím slim (whereas 62% of American women age 20 to 74 are overweight)
  • Iím attractive (my new picture has been rated more attractive than 86% of the women on Hot or Not — and the women who upload their pictures are a self-selected sample that is probably already biased towards being more attractive than the general female population)
  • Iím relatively young (whereas 82% of American adult women are over 30 years old)
  • Iím intelligent (IQ tested at 145 when I was a child, which is 3 standard deviations above the mean — higher than 99.85% of the population. Even if Iíve gotten dumber as Iíve aged Iím probably still at least a 130, which is higher than 97.5% of the population.)
  • Iím educated (whereas 77% of American women do not have bachelorís degrees)
  • I have my financial shit together (no debt, perfect credit history, 6+ months living expenses saved, adequate insurance, self employed)
  • I have a strong libido and love having sex (my lover *never* has to beg, unless itís for me to let him get some sleep!)
  • Most of my interests tend to be more popular with men than women: science fiction, libertarianism, blogging, politics, economics, guns, gambling, etc.

And she caught a fair amount of flak for saying these things: one ex-reader (I assume) sniffed, "Is there a more self righteous bitch anywhere else in the blogsphere?" (Answer: Scads of them.)

For my part, I can't get too worked up about this. At the very least, she's upfront about what she has to offer, and it's up to you to decide whether she matches your particular priorities; rather a lot of folks hide their light under a bushel. (Ask me about my grain elevator.) She doesn't happen to hit mine especially well, as it happens, but that's hardly a reason to criticize someone. And while I tend to be wary of an elevated sense of self — rather a lot of people have defined themselves as Good while doing their best to hide from the advance of Evil — I suspect she's closer to the Ayn Rand side of the spectrum, where love and romance are transactions like any other, and hey, it's a tough market out there. Besides, I'm older than her target age group, and I suspect that the clash of dissimilar libidos would result in either heartbreak or heart attack, neither of which is on my list of Desired Outcomes. Still, I am a firm believer in holding out for what you want, and I can't fault her for doing the same. Bottom line: I think I'd like her; I have no reason to think we ought to be dating.

She adds:

I'm sorry if I've offended you, but I'm also really sick of getting e-mailed several times a week by delusionally hopeful men who read my blog and think because I am their dream girl that I'll therefore want them too. Too often they act crushed when I reject them, which I feel bad about, but if they had stopped to consider whether they had as much to offer me as I have to offer them then they might have had more realistic expectations.

Now that's gonna leave a mark.


  • I did actually email her once, about something of not much importance. Her response could be fairly characterized as direct and precise.
  • Approximately half the population is below average in appearance; a different half (inevitably there is some overlap) is below average in intelligence. I assume I qualify for at least one of the above.
  • I'm relatively old. Even my relatives are relatively old, or at least older than they used to be.
  • On the wealth curve, I rank as "not broke but not rolling in it either."
  • Most of my activities tend to be of no interest to anyone.
  • I get zero emails a week from delusionally hopeful women.

I should also point out that this post multiplied Jacqueline's traffic ninefold, so I can reasonably expect to get three, maybe four extra visits out of this response. And if what you wanted here was a point-by-point response to her assertions, try this.

Posted at 10:27 AM to Table for One

I get zero emails a week from delusionally hopeful women.

Same here, but I happen to know it's because they're so intimidated by my insufferably high quality.

Posted by: McGehee at 11:05 AM on 15 August 2006

I get emails from hopefully delusional women, usually trying to get my ebay/paypal/citibank info.

Posted by: Dwayne "the canoe guy" at 12:52 PM on 15 August 2006

Really, how special does one have to be, to be one of the "hot chicks" at the sci-fi convention? (Answer: Totally average.) I know, because I was a totally average "hot chick at the convention," once upon a time. I, however, despite not having Passey's "education," realized that being Queen of the Fanboys doesn't make you Jessica Biel.

Posted by: Veronica at 7:08 PM on 15 August 2006

Back when I was attending cons, any female who showed up at all got to be the Hot Chick by default.

Posted by: CGHill at 7:14 PM on 15 August 2006

All I can say is that the only criteria I'd sort of fit is education. Otherwise, many of those points she listed is really objective (even IQ which I think is totally bunk anyway). Although I really have to wonder--if she really is sick of fanboy emails, she should have never put all that out there in the first place.

Posted by: sya at 10:01 PM on 15 August 2006

Ah, but is she loving and thoughtful?
I am a lot older and fatter than her, but in the rest of her criteria I beat her by quite a bit...
And she hasn't figured out what we gals of the 1950's knew: men need to be cuddled and loved.

Posted by: Boinkie at 4:54 AM on 16 August 2006

Sounds like my ex who was also "perfect" in every way. Just ask her...

Posted by: Winston at 6:30 AM on 16 August 2006

Yeahhhh. I haven't visited her blog in over a year, but it's nice to know that somewhere, someplace, in the deepest recesses of a "self-employed" gambler's reality-deprived mind, some things never change!

Posted by: agent bedhead at 8:47 AM on 17 August 2006

Yeah, she thinks she's so hot and she is STILL single. No quality MAN would ever put up with her shit.

Posted by: KLJ at 9:21 PM on 24 August 2006