Girlmobiles revisited

We covered this topic three years ago, which is long enough for the automotive market to change. Or not, as the case may be.

The auto-industry research group TrueCar has run a bunch of numbers, noting that 64 percent of all vehicle registrations have been recorded in the names of men, yet despite this presumed overwhelming testosteroniness, nine models are registered more often by women than by men.

The top three of these, says True Car, are VW’s New Beetle, the Nissan Rogue, and the Hyundai Tucson. In fact, small SUVlets make up more than half the list, with Honda’s CR-V, Toyota’s RAV4, and the Kia Sportage also represented.

Of course, you know what I think of this sort of thinking:

Is a [fill in make/model] a girl car?

Oh, good God, yes. In fact, just walking near one of those will cause your testicles to shoot up into your crotch like artillery ordnance, leaving your empty scrotum flapping in the breeze; you stand to lose 0.07 inch of penis for every 100 miles you drive. After a year you’ll have grown a pair of C-cups, and by the time you make the last payment you’ll have started your period. (I strongly recommend seat covers.) And don’t go expecting you’ll come out of this looking like Megan Fox in a dress; you’ll look more like Michael J. Fox in a dress. Except for the C-cups, of course.

Which wasn’t quite as funny as this observation by Mister Snitch:

I have a rule of thumb about what qualifies as a ‘chick car’. If it looks as if you could stick a big key into it and wind it up, it’s a chick car.

Certainly explains the New Beetle, anyway.

(Snatched from Autoblog.)


  1. LeeAnn »

    18 June 2010 · 7:02 am

    Testosteroni… the San Francisco treat.

  2. ak4mc »

    19 June 2010 · 10:04 am

    I thought that was a model of Lamborghini.

  3. Tatyana »

    19 June 2010 · 10:13 am

    I feel completely intimidated.

  4. CGHill »

    19 June 2010 · 11:59 am

    I thought that was a model of Lamborghini.

    You’re thinking of the Ferrari Testarossa, which means “redhead,” which ostensibly refers to the cylinder heads, but I prefer to think, um, otherwise.

    Similarly Italian: Maserati’s Quattroporte, one of which I’ve actually driven. The fact that the name means simply “four-door” does not detract from its deliciousness (cf. Ford’s mid-century Tudor and Fordor sedans).

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