Panic on the streets of Anytown

As I might have mentioned before, I don’t spend valuable driving time wondering about gas mileage; after gathering five years of data on this car, I know how much I’m supposed to be getting, and I’m pretty much always getting it. (Revised EPA is 17 city/25 highway; original sticker was 20/28; I average 21/28.)

Besides, I don’t want to be this guy:

My gas mileage reader goes down every time I step on brakes. If I am in park for a while it goes all they way down to 0. Does this mean there is something wrong with my car or that my gas is burning too fast???

Do the math, Binky. If you’re not moving, you’re traveling zero miles, and zero miles divided by any amount of fuel is 0 mpg.

If you’re going to obsess over fuel consumption, you have basically two choices:

  • Buy a farging Prius already. It will get better mileage than anything else you’ve ever owned before, including your dad’s ancient moped.
  • Take the bus and STFU.

Disclosure: My dad did once have a moped. It was a sad little two-wheeler, but it went faster than I could pedal, therefore I was envious. I got over it.


  1. hatless in hattiesburg »

    9 June 2011 · 1:15 am

    the only reason i care about the my car’s actual mileage is to figure out if/when/where i’ll need to stop on long rural drives.

    the new mustang is my first car that does that math for me, and it averages slightly over the estimated 19city/29hwy at almost 21city/30hwy.

  2. fillyjonk »

    9 June 2011 · 6:51 am

    “If you’re not moving, you’re traveling zero miles, and zero miles divided by any amount of fuel is 0 mpg.”

    At least Binky isn’t trying to divide by 0. Because then, we’d all be screwed.

    I don’t worry about my gas mileage. I figure, I maintain my car, I don’t do “jackrabbit” starts, I don’t often sit places where the car has to idle, I use the cruise control on long stretches, so I’m probably doing all I can (within reason) to maximize mileage, and there are just some things a person has limited control over.

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