Toward hoopier (and more hygienic) froods

Inevitably, we must bow to the wisdom of Douglas Adams:

A towel … is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value — you can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapours; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a mini raft down the slow heavy river Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or to avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mindboggingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can’t see it, it can’t see you — daft as a bush, but very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.

In fact, the towel will serve some of us well in seemingly-mundane places like San Francisco:

The legislation will address two issues. First, it will require people who are nude in public to place an item — for example, a towel — underneath them when they sit down. This will avoid situations, as currently occurs, where nudists sit down on public seating without placing anything between their body and the seat. Second, the legislation will require nudists to don clothing before they enter a restaurant.

“San Francisco is a liberal and tolerant city, and we pride ourselves on that fact. Yet, while we have a variety of views about public nudity, we can all agree that when you sit down naked, you should cover the seat, and that you should cover up when you go into a food establishment.”

The quote comes from the man who proposed the measure, Supervisor Scott Wiener.

(Scraped from Lisa Paul’s Facebook wall.)





6 comments

  1. McGehee »

    8 September 2011 · 10:34 am

    Wouldn’t it just be simpler to have a law that says, “Nudists are welcome in San Francisco — just please keep your nudity contained when you’re out in public.”

  2. Lisa Paul »

    8 September 2011 · 3:54 pm

    Here in SF we’re cloaking this as a public health issue, but, to my mind, it’s an aesthetic one. The group of nudists who this law is aimed at (known locally as The Naked Guys) are not exactly the kind of bodies you want to see unclothed — especially as you sip your latte at an outdoor cafe. Now, if Brad and Angie want to come here and strip, we might be a little more tolerant.

  3. Dan B »

    8 September 2011 · 4:36 pm

    From what I’ve seen of the weather there, I woulda thought Frisco is usually too cold to be out running around nekkid.

    Then again, I think rain is wet, so what do I know?

  4. CGHill »

    8 September 2011 · 5:14 pm

    My cutoff point is about 40 degrees Fahrenheit, for what it’s worth. I am told there are far hardier souls than I.

    This may be the one advantage of organized nudism, for all its institutional stuffiness: they emphasize the importance of the towel.

  5. Jeff Brokaw »

    9 September 2011 · 1:08 pm

    Last I saw, hordes of homeless people live on SF city sidewalks. And by “live on” I mean “shit and piss all over”.

    A couple of towels are probably not going to improve the general hygiene situation.

  6. Daily Pundit »

    9 September 2011 · 7:30 pm

    Hot Dogger…

    I was going to blog this myself, but why, when Chaz is around to do the heavy lifting. Yeah, his name really is Weiner. He represents the Castro….

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