Bruise control

I am, of course, around this age:

When I was growing up, we had playgrounds and those playgrounds were made of galvanized steel pipe and surfaced variously with concrete, asphalt, gravel, or just plain dirt. By today’s standards these places were safety nightmares. Kids fell down and they bled, kids jumped, fell, or were pushed off these abominations and they broke bones, bruises and lacerations were so common we didn’t even think about them … and note: We usually only played at these playgrounds under adult supervision. Why, you may ask? Quite simply, by our standards of “fun” playgrounds were just plain boring.

I never broke a bone, but I accumulated quite a nice bunch of bruises over the years, due usually to bicycle mishaps or simple oafishness.

Should a kid make it to double digits without a scratch, you have to figure he’s spent the entire ten years in his room. Apparently some people think that’s a good idea:

Driving in to work today, I found myself stopped at a light next to a large step van belonging to TotTurf, which purports to supply “playground safety surfacing.”

It could be worse. Here’s how:

Turn your playground into a fun-ground!

Talkin’ TotTurf® sensors can trigger a variety of educational and fun-inspired sounds.

Note that these sounds aren’t actually fun, only “fun-inspired.” (A true fun sound would evoke the cutting of cheese, and I don’t mean Stilton.)

I mean, seriously, people, our kids have it bad enough already without having to be treated like toddlers until some time after they reach puberty.


  1. fillyjonk »

    18 November 2011 · 7:19 am

    And then part of the problem is that we get young adults who are so tender that they can’t cope with adult life, and anything that’s not 100% success or any criticism makes them feel like OH YOU ARE SO MEAN. I’m already seeing it in a few of my college students.

    I remember falling off the top of a monkeybars FLAT ONTO MY BACK when I was about 9. I was made to spend the rest of the recess in the nurse’s office in order to be sure I wasn’t genuinely hurt. And I also remember that, at least among the boys, broken wrists from playground incidents were almost a badge of honor.

  2. Roger Green »

    18 November 2011 · 8:43 am

    You’ve possibly heard the Bill Cosby routine The Playground. If not:

  3. Jeffro »

    18 November 2011 · 11:40 am

    Children exposed to dirt have less allergies than those who are not.

  4. McGehee »

    18 November 2011 · 12:08 pm

    Where I went to school through the 5th grade had monkey bars and a swing set over asphalt, but the public school where I attended 6th grade had boxed in the playsets with a bed of sawdust.

    I did fall headfirst off the first set of monkey bars once, but I never told anybody about it, and the bars didn’t get removed until a couple of years later.

  5. Nicole »

    18 November 2011 · 5:57 pm

    New fave phrase: “Fun-inspired.”

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