“The problem with these young fellows nowadays,” says Robert Stacy McCain, “is that young women don’t know how to play hard to get.”
They knew when I was young, but heck, I’m even older than RSM. Still, this seems fairly inarguable these days:
For a lot of kids, it starts in elementary school with the “boyfriend and girlfriend” game, and any boy that’s halfway cute has girls fawning all over him. (Ask the parents of boys how it is.) Even before there’s anything like actual sex involved, the boys get spoiled by all that female attention. It makes the boys arrogant and gives them an unfavorable impression of women generally as desperate, clinging, needy creatures.
I got my own wakeup call on Facebook one day, when a grandson, then well under FB’s ostensible age limit of 13, posted that he was, um, “in a relationship.” Seriously. Did I rat him out to his mom? You betcha. Now is the kid arrogant? Insufficient data at this time.
There is no reason women should be stuck-up — cruelly aloof and distant — but at the same time, a woman does not enhance the value of her companionship by chasing after men. A woman can be friendly and even flirtatious without being easy, and the most brilliant women are those who know exactly where to draw the line, who convey by their manner some sense of their own dignity.
I’ve known a few who met that criterion for “brilliant.” They were, of course, not the least bit interested in me, but then again, even those inclined to chase after guys were likewise lined up none deep on the porch.