Bad Catholic lists several reasons why so-called “Christian music” ought to be put out of its misery. This is just one of them:
Isn’t all singing about Jesus inherently valuable?
No. Love covers a multitude of sins, but a cliched refrain of his Most Holy Name will not cover the fact that your melody, chord progression, and overworked synth track are recycled versions of Nickelback’s last single.
Oh, it gets harsher:
If the reality of Christianity is that which is expressed in the majority of “Christian” songs — and that which K-Love takes as their guiding principle — than I would much prefer to be an atheist. K-Love plays “positive” music. (Don’t get me started on the “cutting-edge.”) Every Christian radio station in existence gives the bizarre assurance before every song they play that they are in fact “positive”, “encouraging”, or “family friendly”. (It seems they could replace it all with “We are about to give you a song that sounds like a blanket on top of a kitten.”)
I know exactly what he’s talking about, so here’s a kitten with a blanket on top:
Determining the exact sound of the song is left as an exercise for the student.
(Via this Jeff Quinton tweet.)