Iconically free, or something

In all probability, the Virginia Assembly will not enact this measure in 2014:

The English Language Integrity Act: Makes it a class 6 felony to do any of the following: (1) use the word “iconic” when what is meant is that something is “familiar”; (2) use the word “literally” to describe something figurative (“I was so mad my head literally exploded”; (3) use “as far as” when “as for” is needed (“as far as Miley Cyrus, I think she’s a tramp”); (4) advertise a product as “free” if the consumer must purchase another product to get it. Reference to a product as a “free gift” shall bring a minimum sentence of five years.

As far as this bill goes, I think it has literally no chance of passage.


  1. hatless in hattiesburg »

    30 December 2013 · 12:48 pm

    the rest of it obviously has no chance, but #4 “free” should be part of false advertising laws everywhere (including va).

  2. Lynn »

    30 December 2013 · 3:17 pm

    Why not? There are already thousands of unenforceable and simply unenforced laws on the books.

    I could think of several more items to add to the list, such as using the wrong one of “there, their or they’re” or the wrong one of “your or you’re.”

  3. backwoods conservative »

    30 December 2013 · 3:25 pm

    One of the things I find annoying is the use of “lead” where “led” is the proper word.

  4. hatless in hattiesburg »

    30 December 2013 · 11:55 pm

    this looks like a job for strongbad! youtu.be/yc2udEpyPpU

  5. canadienne »

    31 December 2013 · 4:13 pm


  6. CGHill »

    31 December 2013 · 5:06 pm

    And anything that sounds like “there.”

  7. Barks »

    2 January 2014 · 8:21 am

    Figuratively speaking, of course.

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