Quote of the week

David Warren’s conspectus — as distinguished from “prospectus” — for Canada’s Conservative Party:

If elected, we promise to do nothing. There will be no new initiative in any area of government. Should some foreign power threaten us, we shall smoosh them promptly. Should some other unforeseen event positively demand our attention, we shall respond in like spirit to make it go away. Such contingencies aside, we shall avoid enterprise of any sort. Instead, we shall devote our entire attention, not to doing, but to undoing things. And not just little things but big things; and not just a few notoriously rotten apples in the eyes of vested interests known to be unloved, but the whole apple pie, the whole bakery. We shall make the Tea Party in the United States look like a bunch of socialist whiners. We shall make the UKIP in Britain look like Europhiles. Our ambition, as we cling to power, shall be to undo every gratuitous Act of Parliament, or other superannuated government measure, going back to Confederation, if not to Champlain. We shall repeal legislation, erase regulations, close government departments, demolish the buildings, salt the earth on which they stood, fire and retire civil servants by the refugee shipload. We shall sack them on the beaches, we shall sack them on the landing grounds, we shall sack them in the fields and in the streets, we shall start with the CBC. Our motto shall be that of the Machine Gun Corps of the British Army in the Great War. (“Saul hath slain his thousands, but David his tens of thousands.”) We shall do this deliberately and persistently and remorselessly with no more attention to public opinion than will be necessary to lure our opponents into traps.

Inexplicably — or maybe not so inexplicably — the Conservatives chose not to adopt this as a platform.







3 comments

  1. Nicole »

    1 June 2014 · 7:01 pm

    I could get on board with a platform like that. Especially since he uses the word “smoosh.”

  2. What The TEA Party Platform Should Be | The Camp Of The Saints »

    1 June 2014 · 7:07 pm

    [...] Special thanks to Dustbury [whose blog is well-worth a regular visit, by the way] for introducing me to the writings of this talented fellow, David Warren [a descendent of Dr. Joseph Warren, perhaps?], who recently proposed this become the Platform of the Conservatives in Canada: [...]

  3. McGehee »

    1 June 2014 · 7:35 pm

    If they had, I’d immigrate.

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