Out of the Garden, into the Sunshine

There is much chatter about the 21st Century Exodus, from California to Texas. We don’t hear so much about this move down Interstate 95:

I moved to Florida from New Jersey a couple of weeks ago because of a number of personal and financial reasons.

Many New Jersey residents are doing the same, including my accountant. She, as I, can pay for a small mortgage, real estate taxes, insurance and association fees on a condo in Florida on what we paid for real estate taxes alone in New Jersey. Add the fact that Florida has no personal income tax, and you’ll have loads of New Jerseyans heading to Florida. I had my car transported by truck, and the man who delivered it told me the 9 other cars belonged to people who are moving to Florida.

There is, of course, a drawback:

New Jersey is hot and humid in the summer, but you don’t know humid hotness until you’re in South Florida to stay. The main difference between the two is, Miami doesn’t really cool off at night.

I’ve never been to Miami, though a couple of trips to Orlando gave me a healthy respect for — or maybe an abject fear of — Florida humidity, especially since it can do things like this:

Morning walks before the temps hit the mid eighties (in both temperature and humidity) become a streaming flow of sweat pouring down from my scalp, through my clothes, slowing down enough to puddle in my bra — not stopping until reaching my ankles. Anything not made of natural fabrics (including two tops made of “wicking” material) then becomes clammy the moment you step into an air-conditioned building. The result can best be called a synthetically-induced hot flash: Brutal sweat followed by chilling dampness.

And people wonder why LeBron would go back to Cleveland.







3 comments »

  1. Laura »

    2 August 2014 · 11:37 am

    People that have lived in Florida tell me it is more humid here in South Carolina, especially when you’re in the midlands away from the ocean. And I have been to Florida- I agree completely with them. I am in a state of perpetual sweat at least 8 months out of the year.

  2. CGHill »

    2 August 2014 · 11:53 am

    I really didn’t pay attention to the humidity when I was a kid growing up in South Carolina. Then again, I was on the coast. And in Florida, you’re never that far from the coast — so maybe they’ve adjusted themselves.

    I’ve always felt that there was a specific Sweat Band through S.C., and I was most amused to see the area-code splits in the Nineties: the major Sweaty Areas were all left in 803, while upstate and the coast were assigned new codes.

  3. McGehee »

    2 August 2014 · 12:25 pm

    I don’t know why anyone moving to Florida would insist on moving to South Florida.

    You can get all the tax benefits and less of the crime in, say, St. Augustine.

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