Comments on: Hey, babe, easy on the Plutarch

By: Matt

Matt — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 08:18:35 +0000

If only the whole gender-war thing hadn’t gotten involved, the first quote would have been entirely on-point.

Even those of us who love genius girls (I’m happily engaged to marry one) are turned off by “academic name dropping” (not a term I’d use, but not _wrong_ either). It _is_ a sign of insecurity, and there’s a big gap between someone who’s smart and someone who’s always out to prove how smart they are. When we find the latter, we run.

Of course, I’ve seen the exact same behavior in men, and frankly I’ve seen it way more often. I doubt women find it any more attractive in men than men find it in women.

I’m not 100% on-board with Mr. Porretto’s thesis, but I suspect it’s probably true in a lot of cases.

By: CGHill

CGHill — Sat, 04 Nov 2006 22:05:02 +0000

Then there's this: "It's depressing when every girl you talk to is dumb or obsessed with money or has no sense of humor or won't shut up about herself or prattles on about some stupid TV show. It's depressing when you find out that everyone is dull and stupid, but it's even worse when you realize — so are you." (Found by Bill Peschel, just in time.)

By: Francis W. Porretto

Francis W. Porretto — Sat, 04 Nov 2006 14:46:36 +0000

You have a good point, Andrea, but still, major differences in intelligence or erudition are one of today's larger stumbling blocks to romantic compatibility. I think that even if gender-war feminism could somehow be subtracted from the equation, it would still be difficult for two persons with a pronounced "smartness gap" to balance it.

By: CGHill

CGHill — Sat, 04 Nov 2006 14:19:40 +0000

Well, I did actually see Tartuffe on stage, albeit in translation, which means that if I missed something, I can theoretically blame the translator. [We pause briefly while the world contemplates the incomprehensible: there was a performance of Molière in Oklahoma, fercrissake.] These days I am inclined to believe that being au courant is inimical to our intelligence, that the need to keep up with the Zeitgeist has a deleterious effect on our sense of self and our grasp of the Big Picture.

By: Andrea Harris

Andrea Harris — Sat, 04 Nov 2006 13:14:48 +0000

It’s not that the woman is smarter than the man, it’s that both sexes tend to have problems relating that have nothing to do with intelligence. From my experience and observation (full disclosure: mostly observation), women who are intelligent have been told all their lives how wonderful they are, how much better than everyone, especially men, who will want to keep them down. (I am obviously talking about contemporary women.)

By: Eternity Road

Eternity Road — Sat, 04 Nov 2006 11:50:44 +0000

Off-Road Punditry: Romance And The Smartness Gap

It’s not that long ago that every newspaper in every city or town in this blessed land was trumpeting the struggles of unmarried Americans at finding someone suitable to love. It was the heyday of the singles’ ad, the dating service, and the …

By: Francis W. Porretto

Francis W. Porretto — Sat, 04 Nov 2006 10:12:59 +0000

What? You say you might have misapprehensions about Tartuffe? Oh, the shame!

Seriously, though, there are certain tensions that arise in couples that have a significant difference in intellect or education. They tend to be at their worst when she is much smarter or better educated than he is. Those tensions can spoil what might otherwise have been a fine and fulfilling romance. I could tell you stories…but November is Be-Kind-To-Your-Exes Month, and I don’t need the extra psychic odium.