Kiss me, I’m spiritual
There are, generally, two places where you’ll find the phrase “spiritual, but not religious”: the About (or similar) page on someone’s blog, and in a profile on a dating service.
The latter, at least, is a means toward an end:
A sweeping new psychological survey has come to the conclusion that North Americans tell others they have spiritual beliefs to appear more attractive, especially to prospective mates.
People subconsciously paint flattering pictures of themselves by revealing they have inner spiritual beliefs, according to Constantine Sedikides, a social psychologist at Southampton University in Britain.
The strong link between spiritual convictions and social attractiveness is based on Sedikides’ overview of 57 different international studies, which recently appeared in the prestigious Personality and Social Psychology Review.
And for some reason, this link is strongest in the US and Canada. The reason for this is apparently unclear:
Sedikides wonders if people believe the self-worth of a person rises if they believe themselves, or others, are valued in the eyes of a divine reality.
Other evolutionary psychologists have speculated self-enhancement expands when people assume, rightly or wrongly, “spiritual” people may be more trustworthy, believe in something beyond their own self-interest or are inclined to monogamy.
It might even be simpler than that: some people are resistant to the very idea of dogma, at least to the extent that it’s alleged to be handed down from on high. (Horizontal dogma, otherwise known as “All my friends have the same delusions,” is just fine; just don’t introduce a vertical component.) Besides, how different, qualitatively quantitatively, is “spiritual, but not religious” from “promiscuous, but not slutty”?
And I suspect that if people could be persuaded that they’d get laid more often if they bore the image of the AT&T Death Star on their bodies, there’d be a worldwide shortage of blue tattoo ink inside of a week.
Update: Fixed an inappropriate word.
fillyjonk »
21 January 2010 · 8:26 am
Oddly, it makes me think of the old joke about the woman who gets pulled over by a cop. She demands to know why – she wasn’t breaking any laws. He tells her: “you yelled obscenities out your window several times. You flipped off several drivers. You cut off a little old lady. And I see a Jesus Fish stuck on your bumper. So I assumed the car was stolen.”
Maybe that’s because I’ve known people who claimed to be “spiritual” who really only actually were when it seemed like it would benefit them to seem so.
Lynn »
21 January 2010 · 8:53 am
B.S. I consider myself spiritual but not religious and in my case it obviously has nothing to do with trying to appear more attractive. In fact I rarely even tell people that. There is a huge difference between religious and spiritual. Spiritual is more open, not settled on any particular set of dogma but willing to believe that maybe there is something out there or, just a vague sense of spirituality – connectedness with the universe, maybe – without necessarily believing in a deity.
Lynn »
21 January 2010 · 8:55 am
FYI, I typed my comment before I saw Fillyjonk’s.
fillyjonk »
21 January 2010 · 9:14 am
I’m not denying the possibility, just acknowledging that there are some people who will claim lots of stuff that might not apply to them because they think it makes them look better.
Perhaps teaching has set my “that’s not really true, is it?” filter a bit high.
fillyjonk »
21 January 2010 · 9:15 am
And actually, as for myself, I prefer to let my actions/words speak than to claim anything. I remember an old video I saw of Archbishop Fulton Sheen on What’s My Line where one of the contestants asked, “Are you a religious person?” (or maybe it was “are you devout?”) and he answered, “I hope so.”
I guess I just prefer not to make claims about myself lest those claims be proven untrue.