The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

11 February 2007

Next: hybrid Hummers

Back in December I made some offhand remark about variations on the Oreo theme, including such wacky ideas as an Oreo with no discernible chocolate whatsoever, which I pronounced my favorite of the bunch.

This week, an edition I hadn't seen before turned up on the shelf at Albertson's, and I was sufficiently weirded-out to buy. It's the traditional Oreo, but it's organic.

Really. Here's the Ingredients list:

Organic wheat flour, organic evaporated cane sugar, palm oil, expeller-pressed oleic safflower oil, cocoa (processed with alkali), organic brown rice syrup, organic cornstarch, leavening (baking soda and/or calcium phosphate), sea salt, soy lecithin (emulsifier), organic vanilla extract.

Of this list, only cocoa, soy lecithin and baking soda show up in standard-issue Oreos. The Nutrition Facts are almost identical — the organic version lists 13 grams of sugar and 75 mg of potassium (presumably from calcium phosphate), versus 14 grams of sugar and no potassium at all in the standard version.

Of course, what you want to know is "How does it taste?" To these jaded taste buds, it's slightly less sweet than the usual Oreo, and the cookie seems just a shade more resistant to breakage. I'd rate it a percentage point or two above its brandmates. Its price, unfortunately, is more than a percentage point or two higher: I paid $3.49 for an 8.5-ounce box, while its corporate cousins were going for $2.99 (in fact, on sale for $2.50 yesterday) for 18 ounces. And it's still an Oreo, which means you're not going to be able to pass it off as some kind of health food — but at least it's a whole lot less artificial. And that's an accomplishment of sorts: it's not often you can get something with more-or-less "natural" origins to come off as purely synthetic.

Assuming I'm reading the kosher certification correctly, this is a dairy product.

Posted at 9:35 AM to Worth a Fork

It's funny to me that the word chosen for this particular kind of food is "organic." Salt is clearly inorganic. That's all I'm saying.

Posted by: Dan at 1:27 PM on 11 February 2007

Oreos are comfort food, plain and simple. Having a bad day? Eat an Oreo. (More likely, and honestly, a BAGFUL of them.) If they were ever taken off the market, there'd be Road Rage and PMS sweeping the nation like you would not believe, the Doomsday Clock would get pushed to a minute past, Spiderman would be Venom in perpetuity, and every day would be Rodney King Day.

Don't mess with the elemental aspects of life, man. Put the bag down, and walk away slowly.

Posted by: Mister Snitch! at 2:15 PM on 11 February 2007