Strange search-engine queries (53)

About five thousand people land on this site every week. Sometimes it's deliberate; sometimes they're just looking for something. And sometimes the something they're looking for is worth mentioning here.

god of refrigeration:  Hail to thee, O mighty Freon. R-134 is but a pretender to thy mighty throne.

the river that shares its name with the city of san francisco:  Hint: it's not the Columbia.

hal cash atm:  "I'm sorry, Dave, I can't allow you to overdraw your account."

gamma girls:  Do they take beta blockers?

which females has the nicest and biggest breats [sic] according to astrology?  Gemini. Think "twins."

potable cd-r recorder:  I find that a little hard to swallow.

what does a woman with 36B bust look like:  Migod, you'd think they were rare or something.

compelling reason for your marriage to be unpublicized:  You're marrying Paris Hilton.

Chance of dying at 49:  In my case, zero.

is this a lasting treasure, or just a moment's pleasure?  If I tell you now, will you promise not to ask again?

Is it okay to use an epilator on the face?  If you don't mind feeling like you've been smooching a Weed Eater, sure.

women as doormats:  No way to get them to look up to you, believe me.

clueless men what women want:  I don't claim to know what women want, but I suspect it's not clueless men.

zip code 78666 satan:  Um, no, San Marcos.

impacts of improper disposal of chicken:  Imagine a giant beak pecking at a face — forever....

Posted at 6:25 AM to You Asked For It