The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

26 March 2007

Strange search-engine queries (60)

It's the ever-popular Monday-morning wrap-up of all the weird questions asked by your friends and neighbors Tuesday through Saturday. (Well, not all of them, obviously.)

fifty year old jokes:  When Berle told them, they were already fifty years old.

who is taking ownership of crossroads mall oklahoma city:  Teenagers, sometimes armed.

Pepsi can masturbation:  I assume you don't just pop one out of the fridge.

halle berry perfect stranger masturbate:  Why, is she carrying a Pepsi can?

what accident did meatloaf have 20 years ago:  He ran into Jim Steinman's ego.

where can i get laid in tulsa:  The Doubletree has always worked for me.

enema search engines:  Is there one called Ass.com?

zyzzyx scrabble:  Rotsa ruck. First, it's a proper noun; second, you'll have to use both blanks, which means you're scoring a maximum of 26 points unless you hit a Premium Square.

babes in varying degrees of undress:  Your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to reduce the variation.

funtionally illiterate survey:  Oh, look, there's some now.

leg-to-body ratio:  In most humanoids, two to one.

racket pin steering:  Yeah, I used to have a car like that.

suitable clothing to birthday:  You mean, something other than one's birthday suit?

outraging public decency Oklahoma City:  Hey, I try my best.

"a never-ending stream of the third-rate":  Hey, I try my best.

can putting yogurt in your virginia help your yeast infection:  Only if applied south of Charlottesville.

Posted at 6:23 AM to You Asked For It