Strange search-engine queries (79)

The referrer log is a river, endlessly flowing, bringing the details of your visits; once in a while I stick in a pan, shake it a bit, and see if I can come up with some pure comic gold, or at least some risible pyrite.

is it illegal to be in your back yard naked in phoenix:  Not necessarily, but you'd better have SPF 6.0221415 × 10²³.

walmart how do they get away with paying such low wages:  Because you keep shopping there.

der wienerschnitzel vegan:  Cognitive dissonance boiled down to three words.

clever ways to deal with a steep driveway in the winter:  "Bribe your neighbor to shovel it off" seems like it might work.

girlfriend says penis taste weird:  Compared to what? Arugula? Zucchini?

big hooters:  The one on I-240 is 5,285 square feet.

ocelot spleen:  We never get requests for proper food.

how to get infinite minutes on a motorola V170 phone:  Plug the flux capacitor directly into the charging port.

INTJs don't date:  Not true. They just won't date you.

what does it mean when a transmission is rebuilt:  It means you get to write a very large check.

how do I undress the Feng twins:  Presumably one at a time.

car is an extension of men's penis:  If that were the case, you'd see bigger bumper guards.

Posted at 6:15 AM to You Asked For It