The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

27 August 2007

Strange search-engine queries (82)

Four thousand people a week (more or less) visit this site, and at least a third of them come here, not because they think I'm so by-gosh wonderful, but because they're looking for something very specific. And if they're looking for something that's both very specific and very weird, it ends up here.

ayn rand doofus:  But a fiercely-independent doofus.

amish built mobile homes in springfield missouri:  Mobile barns, maybe.

Are wood floors supposed to creak?  If they don't, I start to suspect laminate.

crazy wife girlwatching:  If your wife catches you girlwatching, she might well go crazy.

funtionally illiterate survey:  See "self-fulfilling prophecy."

are there any nudist clubs in oklahoma?  Yes.

what homeowners need to know about live in boyfriends:  They're never around when you need the lawn mowed.

psychedelic underpants:  Wasn't that an LP by the Blues Magoos? *

What is the most overrated virtue:  Sympathy, especially when it's used to justify political schemes.

What is a reasonable amount of time to wait to have sex again with your husband after you find out he has been cheating on you for 7 yrs?  How about "never"? Is "never" good for you?

cuddle a vulture:  When you get done, I have a sloth that needs speeding up.

i checked someone else's "voice mail" at work:  Which is how you got tagged with the term "snoop."

insane furniture building directions:  Take the second light after you pass the vacant lot where the old church used to be, and then keep going until you think you've gone too far, then hang a left.

does fur affect the penis if you rub it against it:  Whose fur?

* No.

Posted at 6:53 AM to You Asked For It

Wow. You get really interesting searches. I like your response to how long should you wait to have sex with husband after finding out he has been cheating for 7 years. And fur on penis--"like oh my gosh, gag me with a spoon. Like totally gross. You know?"

Posted by: Heather at 9:47 AM on 27 August 2007

I don't know anything about psychedelic underpants, but I had a girlfriend who smuggled a batch of LSD across Europe in her bra.

Posted by: triticale at 5:45 PM on 27 August 2007

"insane furniture building directions": I wonder if they were looking for directions on building insane furniture, directions on building furniture for insane people, directions to the actual insane furniture building, or what direction the future of insane furniture building holds.

Posted by: Rob "Flack" O'Hara at 4:13 PM on 28 August 2007

Hmm. I could go for some psychedelic underpants, I think. Why does that sound appealing or even necessary, I wonder? I'll Google it...

Ah. Psychedelic boxers with pictures of Althouse on them. The perfect blogger's Christmas gift.

Oh yeah. You're hittin' that link.

Posted by: Mister Snitch! at 8:39 PM on 30 August 2007