1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.