The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

22 November 2007

Two of us, riding nowhere

The question of "When is it a date?" having already been settled, the next item for discussion is "How do you know if you're officially a couple?" Trish offers guidelines:

I think I'm dating someone. I'm not really sure, because I was a bit drunk when we had the conversation, but I'm pretty sure this is the case. Something about planning a golf outing with a couple we were boozing with, and when he heard of it, he just looked at me and said "So we're a couple then?" And I retorted with something like "Well, when you take me to a wedding and I have to meet your mom (granted, while downing multiple glasses of wine while at the reception), it's safe to say we'll probably go out again."

This may sound a trifle vague, but it pretty much has to: you have Couples, which are obvious, and you have Non-Couples, which are also obvious, but there's no distinct line of demarcation between the two groups.

There are external forces acting on the participants, of course:

I've known him for a year or so, so there's bound to be some level of familarity there. We have some mutual friends, so it's not that big of a stretch for me to hang out with his friends. And I actually entered the circle quite innocently, and managed to not make out with any of his friends before we started talking/dating/whatever.

So: moving, if not exactly hurtling, toward Coupledom. By nature, I am suspicious when these things happen too quickly. (Not that they happen to me, but that's another matter, irrespective of speed.)

Posted at 1:48 PM to Table for One


Well, in my experience two people are a couple if, and only if, both of them think so.

I also found that, when the other doesn't think so, no amount of persuasive argument -- such as recourse to some kind of rules of (for want of a less loaded word) engagement -- is ever going to carry the day.

Posted by: McGehee at 3:08 PM on 22 November 2007