The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

25 January 2008

Quote of the week

Dr Helen answers a letter from someone whose dance card is empty, and draws this sort-of-mournful comment:

As yet another old virgin, I already know the problem isn't that women don't want to have sex, it's that they don't want to have sex with someone as ugly as me. Why would they, when there are a million George Clooney clones out there who will bang even the ugliest girl on request, or even the hint of a request? Those of us who didn't win the genetic cleft-chin lottery are thus left with no dates besides our right hands.

Experience has taught me the reason women tend to freak out over things like pornography is because they project onto men the same "trade-up-until-I-get-the-hottest-guy" attitude they themselves have, and can't comprehend that even the fattest and ugliest real-life girl is better to most guys than the sexiest porn star that only interacts with you through the TV screen.

Two points:

  • Some of us are left-handed.

  • I don't know very many women who seek to trade up until they get the "hottest guy," but then again, it could be argued that I don't know very many women, period.

And I figure that yes, I've lost out on some dates by dint of being unsightly; but I've probably lost out on just as many for being bitter, nasty, recalcitrant and otherwise obnoxious.

Posted at 3:03 PM to QOTW , Table for One

TrackBack: 10:18 PM, 26 January 2008
» How not to charm women from I See Invisible People
This comes from a post CG Hill had yesterday that really got my hackles up. Not at him - his response was great. At the guy he quoted. I couldn't let it go at just a comment on his site....[read more]

If he seriously believes most women "trade up to the hottest guy," I'm not surprised he's still single.

It seems to me - from an informal observation of my friends and relatives who have successfully tied the knot - that emotional compatibility, shared values, the ability to laugh together, and, perhaps most importantly, sufficient maturity on both member's parts are what it takes. Not hotness.

Then again, perhaps the mere fact that I'm assuming dating has the ultimate end of marriage marks me as a hopelessly prudish old maid. (Which I am anyway, though I normally don't spend much time fretting about it, except when we're subjected to Unattached People Just Might As Well Kill Themselves Day, a/k/a Valentine's Day.)

Posted by: fillyjonk at 3:49 PM on 25 January 2008

He refers to sex as "banging" and is surprised that women aren't interested?

Or that the "fattest and ugliest real-life girl" just isn't grateful enough to be considered better than nothing? How uppity can a woman get?!

Yeah, I'd "trade up" on this guy - to a decent human being.

Posted by: Terry at 4:14 PM on 25 January 2008

On the concept of trading up--it reminded me of one of the short stories in an old Asimov collection that I've recently read. Anyways, if a woman is so superficial that she only prefers to go out with the hotter guy regardless of his other qualities, then she's probably not worth having a relationship with anyway.

Posted by: sya at 5:08 PM on 25 January 2008

Hm. I think George Clooney is ugly, so I guess I don't count in this guy's calculations.

Posted by: Andrea Harris at 10:38 PM on 25 January 2008

Charles, you keep providing me with material!

Posted by: Francis W. Porretto at 10:01 AM on 26 January 2008

You can be bitter, nasty and obnoxious?

I don't believe it.

Posted by: Tatyana at 9:22 PM on 26 January 2008

You kidding? Those are my good points.

Posted by: CGHill at 10:10 PM on 26 January 2008

Here goes my notorious inability to read people.

Or maybe it's one more point "pro" moving to OK.
See, what you call "obnoxious" there is a normal polite conversation in NY...

Posted by: Tatyana at 3:41 PM on 27 January 2008