Archive for Rag Trade

So quotidian

This was the tweet as I read it:

Thence to Pinterest, which put up the usual “Sign up if you expect to see this,” but not before I’d tabbed over to Nordstrom.com, where I found this:

Georgia by MICHAEL Michael Kors

This is “Georgia,” from the MICHAEL line of Michael Kors, and it’s on sale to Nordstrom customers before the store’s anniversary sale starting the 17th. And maybe it’s just a little glittery for everyday, but perhaps there are nights for which nothing else will do. “Georgia” stands four inches tall on a half-inch platform, and there’s a bit more peep than the average peep-toe, which may or may not be a good thing. $150 later; $100 during the current sale.

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Begun, the bra wars have

And the town of Guilderland, New York, has been shaken to its very, um, foundations:

The bitter feud between the owners of Madame Pirie Famise Corset Shoppe and Her Underthings has grown more spiteful and uncomfortable for customers than, well, an ill-fitting bra.

The two specialty shops that offer custom fitting on women’s girdles and a wide selection of undergarments — including hard-to-find bras in sizes ranging from 30AAA to 56O — are locked in a pitched battle as their two businesses operate one-half block apart and try to bury the competition.

Where did this begin?

“Yes, it’s a feud, but I didn’t start it. I created a business to honor my late sister and I ended up in all this childish nonsense,” said Jackie Keto, 24, owner of Her Underthings. She opened the competing business in the Price Chopper plaza at 1704 Western Ave. in November 2014 after a judge ruled she could no longer use the Madame Pirie name or operate the store at its previous location of 1660 Western Ave.

Rosa Belleville ran Madame Pirie’s at 1660 Western Ave. for 14 years until she sold the business to an employee and protege, Jessica Keto, in January 2014 for $500,000. The deal included a $250,000 cash down payment and $250,000 to be paid in installments.

When Keto died unexpectedly at her Albany home on March 19, 2014 at 28, the future of Madame Pirie’s was thrown into doubt.

Keto’s younger sister, Jackie, who had worked at Pier 1 Imports in Colonie and majored in business and entrepreneurship at the College of Saint Rose, agreed to run the store. “It kind of fell to me,” she said.

Since her sister had only owned the business for about two months before her sudden death, the Keto family asked Belleville if they could return the Madame Pirie business and get the late woman’s $250,000 down payment back. Belleville declined and said she had already made extensive travel plans and wished to remain retired.

It got more complicated. Jackie Keto refused to continue the installment payments, on the basis that the inventory purchased from Madame Pirie was “old junk” that could not be sold. (Not so, said Belleville.) Keto eventually opened up a new store a few doors down, and used the old storefront to promote it. This annoyed Belleville enough to acquire a new storefront and reopen Madame Pirie.

I, of course, take no sides here, but I quail at Her Underthings’ slogan: “the place you get your bras at!”

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This high, but no higher

There are high heels, and there are really high heels. The obvious question: how high is too high?

In our search for the answer on how to achieve comfort without giving up our lift, we tapped the brain of Dr. Emily Splichal, podiatrist and human movement specialist, and posed the question: What is the heel height we should be shopping for?

“You shouldn’t walk in heels higher than three inches,” she says. “Anything over the three-inch mark changes the biomechanics of how you walk—your strides are shortened, you can’t walk as fast, your body weight shifts to the ball of the foot, which throws off your center of gravity and stresses the knees and lower back.”

Of course, if you’re not walking — never mind, that was silly. So flats for everyone, then? Nope:

Also harmful is a too-flat shoe, she cautions, especially if someone’s foot is naturally flat (little to no arch versus a high arch): “A little heel, like a one-inch heel, puts the foot into a more stable position.”

The takeaway here is to shop for shoes with heels that range between one inch and three in height. “Avoid heels that are both too flat or too high,” she advises. “Avoid the extremes.”

I suspect there might be just a little bit of leeway at either edge of this continuum, depending on one’s individual tootsies. And there is a small but consistent market for shoes with negative heels.

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A flower for everybody

About 2007, I came up with this bit of whimsy:

Maybe it’s time for something other than numbers. Example: In the early 1950s, hosiery manufacturers were trying to distinguish among a line of three or four sizes without using accusative terms like, say, “large.” I shuffled through some advertising pieces from this period and happened upon a 1953 ad from Wayne Knitting Mills, who sold stockings under the Belle-Sharmeer brand. They offered four sizes, as follows:

  • BREV (purple edge) for slender or small legs. Sizes 8 to 10½
  • MODITE (green edge) for average size legs. Sizes 8½ to 11
  • DUCHESS (red edge) for tall, larger legs. Sizes 9½ to 11½
  • CLASSIC (plain edge) for largest legs. Sizes 9½ to 11½

You might guess that “Brev” had something to do with shortness, but the others tell you nothing.

Welcome to Manifesta, where there are no sizes, only flowers:

We don’t want there to be an inherent order to the sizes, with women striving to fit into the smallest number possible. And we don’t want women to feel bad for ordering a size that society has deemed “unacceptable.” We just want you to get what fits. So to find your size, use your measurements, not society’s idea of what you should be.

Okay, one gives it away, maybe: “Willow,” for 36-24-36 or thereabouts. (“If she’s five-three,” said Mix-A-Lot.) From there, the range goes from “Poppy” to “Dahlia.” And if this sounds a trifle Garanimalistic, well, who believes numerical sizes anymore?

(Via Fark.)

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A largish complaint

The plus-sized woman, says Fern Olivia, gets short shrift, when she gets any shrift at all:

Why the hell are the biggest clothes in just one little corner of any shop nowadays, surrounded by gorgeous pictures of plus sized models? I feel like 1. this is so embarrassing, especially if people are self conscious about their size, and 2. I felt like I was being shoved to one side away from all of the pretty clothes in to a selection of ugly maternity looking old women clothes. I found a few sized 16 things in the “normal” section, let’s say, because that’s basically how it made me feel, and they were skin tight and definitely not a size 16 at all.

The word that seems to stand out here is “few”:

Even looking through the sized 6-14 selection of clothes, everything was like a size 6/8. I know a lot of girls are this size, but if larger sizes are the ones that are selling more, why not restock quicker or at least order more just in case? There is nothing more disappointing than finding something you really like and not being able to pick out your size. I also guarantee that if you go on online websites you’ll see about 2000 pieces of clothing, if you then refine it by size to 16, 18 etc, you’ll see about 10 different items.

Were I of a conspiratorial mindset, I might think that this was a plot by the sixes and eights to discourage traffic by those Larger Folk, whom they would rather not see if they can help it.

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Wedged in

Striding through Japan’s Haneda Airport, it’s Amal Alamuddin Clooney in a knit dress by Missoni that InStyle.com described, aptly enough, as “breezy.” My attention is guaranteed:

Amal Clooney at Haneda Airport in Japan

I adore the color scheme. But what they wanted to show you, apparently, was the shoe, so let’s get a closer look:

Espadrille wedge by Valentino

A tricky shoe indeed. If you’re watching from the side, it might look like a jacked-up (four and a half inches) T-strap, but the shoe — “Rockee” by Valentino — obviously lacks the center strap that defines the T. InStyle.com says that it “simultaneously elevated and grounded her look.” There’s also a black version, with the same neutral-colored platform. Either way, it’s $845 at Nordstrom.com.

You may notice, in the full-length shot, the Ordinary Folks trying their best to get a picture of Mrs. Clooney as she walks away from them.

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No place for a face

Lindsay Ellingson, thirty and tall, meets the general definition, as once specified by David Letterman, of “leggy supermodel.” But this sentence from her Wikipedia page, describing her work for Victoria’s Secret, somewhat messes with my head:

In 2011, she became one of the brand’s signature Angels, as well as the face of its perfume line VS Attractions and its new bra, Gorgeous.

I really, really don’t want to imagine someone being the face of a bra. Really.

The actual introduction, however, seems kind of prosaic:

Lindsay Ellingson introduces the Gorgeous bra for Victoria's Secret

Um, okay. (By the way, her eyes are up there.)

Last week at Cannes, by comparison, she was downright futuristic in Ulyana Sergeenko:

Lindsay Ellingson at Cannes 2015

Says Heather of the Fug Girls:

I like the liquid-look fabric. This whole outfit looks to me like a special-effect — like when Robert Patrick in Terminator 2 would be in the middle of morphing from metal into human. In that vein, I like the middle of the dress and am waiting for the rest of it to catch up.

And then it doesn’t happen:

Lindsay Ellingson at Cannes

Heather again:

Naturally, I hate the back. She looks like a very expensive circus performer.

Normal guys will be delighted to hear that Lindsay married a normal guy last year, quite uncharacteristic of leggy supermodels.

(Photos: Gorgeous bra, Adam Bielawski; Cannes, Getty Images.)

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Ann and Lane, BFFs

Whether this portends anything else, I can’t tell just yet:

How many women’s suits and dresses could you buy for $2.2 billion? For Ascena Retail Group, Inc. the answer is all of the suits and dresses sold in all of the Ann Taylor and LOFT stores.

The Wall Street Journal reports that Ann Inc., the owner of stores Ann Taylor and LOFT, has agreed to sell itself for $2.2 billion to rival Ascena Retail Group, which operates Lane Bryant and Dressbarn.

Both companies … have reportedly struggled recently when it comes to the weak retail environment for their target group of women 20 to 40 years of age, the WSJ reports.

Meanwhile, Dressbarn is mutating, or is being remodeled, into “Dressbar”: apparently the Dressbarn name will be reserved for garments that are, um, not dresses. Okay, fine. As long as Lane Bryant doesn’t hook up with Kobe.

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Frontal assault

Sometimes I imagine it’s just this difficult:

Triumph – Find the One from ChezEddy on Vimeo.

(Via Cartoon Brew.)

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Credibly blue

We have on occasion presented an outfit worn by the First Lady, mostly because her choices have sometimes seemed random: for every “Oh, this is lovely” I’ve breathed, there’s been a “What the fark was she thinking?”

Michelle Obama in Tadashi Shoji

While this is admittedly just about the least flattering pose I could find from this particular state dinner, FLOTUS here, I think, has chosen well:

While Michelle Obama is known, generally, for her lavish design choices — remember, for a moment, that $2000 sundress that looked like it had been purchased at Target — last night, possibly in response to criticism of the White House and DC media’s out-of-touch Correspondents’ Dinner performance, the First Lady instead chose a modest gown by Japanese-American designer Tadashi Shoji that would likely retail for around $700.

Part of this was protocol: His Excellency Shinzō Abe, Prime Minister of Japan, was the honoree, and Shoji was born in Japan, though he never did any serious fashion work until he moved to Los Angeles. And this isn’t quite the version Shoji showed on the runway — someone between there and here wisely added a lining — but this is a very nice blue, and it’s not being cluttered up with accessories. Besides, Shoji does texture well: consider, if you will, Octavia Spencer’s gown for the 2013 Academy Awards.

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Stepping outré

I still think there’s a greater need for variable heel heights, but maybe that comes later. In the meantime, we’re on the verge of variable trim colors:

I do hope there’s enough security built into this system to keep other people from changing your shoes with their apps.

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A whole bunch of color

Once in a while, a celebrity will send up a shoefie — selfie of her shoes — and occasionally (probably fewer than 96 times out of a hundred) I’ll notice. This one I noticed:

Clover Canyon’s pitch for this collection:

Everyone knows about the color in Africa: The women in their bright, printed dresses, ripe fruit in the baskets they carry from the market on their heads; the larger-than-life flowers; the endless savannah, all umber earth and toasted grasses. For Pre-Fall 2015 Clover Canyon sets the colors of South Africa into stark relief, printing on black for maximum graphic impact. The geometric painting of Ndebelli village houses is one key motif; another is tribal body painting, interpreted via delicate pointelle neoprene and lasered dots. Of course, there are flowers, too, blossoming out of the signature Clover Canyon collage prints that have been super-sized this season. Pattern here is bolder and more straightforward than before; likewise, this collection’s shapes communicate an unmistakable sense of ease.

At $350, this runs about twenty-odd times the cost of a copy of Paul Simon’s Graceland, if you’re into South African culture once removed from the source.

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Sturdy yet jaunty

An artifact from about nine decades ago:

Iron Clad Hosiery Number 883

And you know, “jolly sassiness” is an attitude I tend to appreciate, even way out here in The Future. “Artificial silk,” usually shortened to “art silk” in the trade, was officially renamed “rayon” in the middle 1920s, about this time this Iron Clad ad appeared.

Cooper, Wells was in business back in the 1880s; they survived at least until 1936, by which time the other major industry in St. Joseph, Michigan, Upton Machine Company, had been making washing machines for twenty-five years. Upton had merged with the Nineteen Hundred Washer Company of Binghamton, New York, and kept that name until after World War II, after which they came up with a new one: Whirlpool.

Incidentally, Frederick Upton, one of the two Upton brothers of St. Joseph, had 18 great-granchildren, one of whom was supermodel Kate Upton, born there in 1992.

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Loyal plastic robots

“Brown shoes,” observed Frank Zappa, “don’t make it.” How prescient he was [warning: autostart video]:

One of St. Louis’ oldest public companies, Brown Shoe, is stepping out with a new name, Caleres.

Brown has been part of the corporate name since the company’s founding in 1878. Next month, however, that name will be dropped once shareholders approve the change on May 28.

“Brown Shoe doesn’t conjure up the image of who we are today,” Brown Shoe’s CEO, president and chairwoman Diane Sullivan said in an interview. “Our name has to be more than a name — it must be managed as a brand. It’s hard to be emotional about a brown shoe.”

Late last year, Brown Shoe announced plans to pursue the Stuart Weitzman brand, which was eventually sold to Coach.

On the rebranding, I’m with Brian J. on this one: “‘Caleres’ conjures up what, exactly?” And what happens to Buster Brown?

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Expansive thinking

This prodigiously cool Armour Dress comes from an Etsy shop, and yes, I suppose I have a weakness for simulated chain mail:

Armour Dress Feirefiz by Mitmunk

What may be more remarkable, though, is that the sizes don’t stop with a smallish Large:

Armour Dress Feirefiz by Mitmunk

Says a happy customer, closer to Figure 2:

My jaw dropped. The print job is gorgeous. The design is fantastic. AND IT’S ON A PLUS SIZE MODEL. I have gotten used to not even bothering to look at cool geeky print stuff because it NEVER comes in a decent plus. It’s usually juniors, or very small straight sizes. But this sexy, warrior woman dress: it came in MY SIZE.

If I’m reading the charts correctly, she’s a 2XL, and this is a stretchy fabric, but hey, it does look pretty good on her. And realistically, one should not expect a warrior woman to be a waif.

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Very nearly scarlet

A not-necessarily-fashion bit from earlier this week:

Outraged celebrities tore into Italian fashion designers Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana on Monday after Dolce described children born to gay couples through fertility treatment as “synthetic”.

Pop superstar Elton John, leading the chorus of criticism, called for a boycott of the brand on Sunday.

I am not convinced that a boycott will make that much difference. By coincidence, Eric Wilson’s “Look Smart” article in the April InStyle — Wilson is the magazine’s Fashion News Editor — looks at the case of John Galliano, a designer who was pilloried back in 2011 for what Wilson describes as a “drunken outburst of anti-Semitic and racial remarks,” resulting in the house of Dior telling Galliano to take a hike. Galliano is back in the industry, as creative director for Maison Margiela, and all, or at least most, seems to be forgiven:

Flash forward to the Screen Actors Guild Awards on January 25, when Jennifer Aniston became the first A-lister since the uproar to wear Galliano, a deep-cut gold dress from his signature collection for 1998, on the red carpet. And there wasn’t much to-do. Not even on Fashion Police, where the E! critics made no mention of Galliano’s past. On February 8, Sophie Hunter wore a Maison Margiela gown at the BAFTAs in London, the same night Rihanna performed at the Grammys in a Margiela tux.

Dolce & Gabbana window in Florence, photo by Debra KolkkaSo if there is any banishment of Dolce and Gabbana, I suspect it will be brief, and then no one will ever speak of it again — with the possible exception of Eric Wilson.

In the meantime, Debra Kolkka has done some window-shopping in beautiful downtown Florence, and judging by D&G’s window, their signature color for the moment is red. Not just any red, of course; we’re talking Spanish bullfighter red. I could learn to like that very quickly, I think. And you should definitely read the whole thing, from which you will learn that (1) not everyone in Florence is thinking of that same color, and (2) yes, D&G will happily sell you the appropriate shoes to go with those dresses.

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Um, probably not

I mean, if I’m going to wear nearly nothing, I might as well wear nothing and be done with it, right?

(Below the fold for reasons that might be obvious.)

Read the rest of this entry »

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Taint necessarily

You know those used-panty vending machines in Japan? Well, forget about them:

When foreigners gush about finding a used panty vending machine, they’re usually referring to a gachapon machine. While many of the machines advertise the contents as used, anyone who can read Japanese knows that this isn’t the case…

Above the price … are the words “super used kakou.” Kakou, in this case, means that the panties were manufactured to appear used — kind of like the Abercrombie jeans that are sold with holes and frayed edges straight from the factory. The addition of [the] two kanji characters makes it instantly apparent to a native speaker that the panties are not, in fact, used. Perhaps an enterprising gachapon machine salesperson realized that they could trick non-Japanese into believing the urban legend by slapping a single English word on the sign.

If this restores your faith in humanity, do not proceed below the jump.

Read the rest of this entry »

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Foiling photographers

The “candid” celebrity photo is not yet a thing of the past, but perhaps this scheme will catch on:

Thanks to DJ Chris Holmes, celebrities can now ward off those pesky paparazzi and their intrusive photography with ease. They just need to wear pieces from Holmes’ new “Anti Paparazzi Collection” — a line of clothing made from a reflective material [that] completely ruins flash photographs.

The collection currently consists of a hooded jacket, an infinity scarf, suit pants, a blazer, and a hat. While they look like regular clothes, the fabric is actually coated with glass nanospheres. This coating makes the clothes act like mirrors when hit with bright light, so the resulting images are horribly underexposed and the wearer is practically invisible.

For example:

Result of photographing a chap in the Anti-Paparazzi Blazer

The line is actually being crowdfunded, and not all the items are currently completely funded yet.

(Via American Digest.)

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Measure for measure

On one level, I absolutely adore this:

Then again, my sight-reading is already questionable without the presence of, um, distractions.

(Via pianist Wayne McEvilly, who wouldn’t have such problems. I think.)

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Training heels?

Elle UK has put up a slideshow of what they deemed the best catwalk shoes on display during Milan’s Fashion Week. Some were awful, some were really awful, and then there was this curious specimen from Moschino:

Moschino shoe from fall/winter 2015 collection

At one level, it seems sorta cute, though I can understand this reaction: “YUK!! A GAZILLION X YUK!!”

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Studied indifference

Some, in fact, majored in it, and this is the sweatshirt for them:

I Literally Do Not Care shirt

The UK branch of Forever 21 has this garment for £12. Size 12 is as far as they go, though: the model here appears to be a 5, maybe. And what’s with the comma after “literally”? Is this a Briticism I’d not previously seen?

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A bag with a grin

Celine, the Shoe Girl, with new discoveries:

Fendi shoes and bag courtesy of the Shoe Girl

These are from Fendi, and I have some reservations about the shoes — exactly what the heck is going on there at the toe? — but that’s definitely a friendly-looking bag. As she says, “Too much cute.”

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Note to future husbands

Of all the red-carpet appearances on Sunday night’s Grammy Awards broadcast, it was Meghan Trainor’s that shook me up the most:

Meghan Trainor at the Grammys in Galia Lahav

This appears to have emerged from Galia Lahav’s MoonStruck collection, about which the designer says:

As the moon is the spotlight amongst the many stars in the night sky, so is the female’s body when reflected within layers of lace and silk. This collection is a black prism of black shades and shimmers of sheer textured fabric representing a midst summer nights dream. Moon Struck elegantly takes you away to a place of serenity where body silhouettes are revealed as a revolutionary era of evening gowns are born.

Rediscovering the mermaid shape as nymphs once roamed the oceans in Greek mythology, this is like a collection like never before, elegant with movement in the night. Each gown holds the shape to a figure of a goddess.

And then suddenly it made sense. Trainor, as she’s mentioned before, ain’t no size 2; but a goddess appears as she damned well pleases. If you have designs on her, so to speak, here are your marching orders. Keep in mind that she brought her dad to the Grammys.

(Via InStyle.com.)

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Size approximate

What is a size 16, anyway? No two manufacturers seem to agree:

[S]itting in my closet are clothes — including jeans — ranging from sizes 14 to 20. Just like no two bodies are ever the same, it would seem no two pairs of jeans are ever the same, either.

So because I’m into fashion/beauty experiments (like finding out how photo editors around the world manipulate my features or gauging reactions to my low-rise bikini), I decided to use my median size of a “16” — which is what I find myself purchasing most often — to investigate what different brands and designers think that number actually means.

Even better, she distinguishes between stretchy and non-stretchy jeans: either “Lycra” or “No Lycra.”

Interestingly, I’d read her Photoshop Me! article when it went viral, so I was ready to take a look at the swimsuit shot. Not half bad, if you ask me.

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Don’t let the stars get in your thighs

Hikaru SkirtThe young lady on the escalator is wearing the Hikaru Skirt — “hikaru” translates to “shining,” which sort of makes sense in this context — and, says Neatorama, it was “designed to illuminate the thighs of anyone certifiably insane brave enough to wear it.”

Of course, this could only happen in Japan, and here’s how it did:

The brainchild of Japanese designer Kiyoyuki Amano, the skirt is lit from underneath with LED lights equipped with gyro sensors, so that the light colors and patterns change with the movement of the model.

Amano said that he was simply experimenting with lights on skirts when he discovered that they shone a spotlight on the wearer’s thighs, which he found enlightening.

There is, so far, no indication that the Hikaru Skirt will be produced in commercial quantities. There is, however, a Tumblr.

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A new Madrid

No, Spain is not moving its capital, nor is that scary fault line through the Missouri bootheel attracting more than perfunctory attention, except among geologists. “Madrid,” in this context, is a shoe from Klogs, which doesn’t appear to be an actual clog — I suppose we could see if there’s enough wood content to make them float — but which have a charm of their own.

Madrid by Klogs from their Villa Collection

From the Klogs Villa Collection, “Madrid” is available in Coffee Metallic (as shown), black, and white. The latter two colors have silver buckles. A Zappos customer likes them:

[I] have a high instep, wide toes, narrow heel, and I supinate and pronate. I have a history of falling arches with hairline fracture and tendonitis, not to mention diabetes and RA. The pain, swelling and fatigue in my feet, ankles, knees, hips and back are gone.

And Fillyjonk likes them:

I know there’s a school of thought that says women’s shoes should be alluring and “sexy.” And yeah, these shoes begin to approach the territory of what a college friend used to call “B.C. Shoes” (B.C. for “Birth Control,” as in “No man will look twice at you when you’re wearing these”).

But to be honest, any more, I dress to please myself rather than to please anyone else, and I like these shoes. I think they’re cute. And they’re definitely comfortable, which is a consideration when you spend multiple hours in a day standing on floors that are a thin layer of tile over poured concrete. They have good support built into the footbed, and I need that. They’re also not too flat, which is something else I need.

“Not too flat,” in this case, is about half an inch of heel rise.

The Villa Collection includes a couple of men’s shoes as well; assuming similar prices, they’d be worth my consideration if they made sizes larger than 13.

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It’s Deb, Jim

The disappearance of one-time mall stalwarts continues apace:

[A]nother mall staple is putting down the store gate for good: Deb is liquidating and closing all 295 of its stores.

You know, Deb. That store where you tried on a bunch of prom dresses but ultimately didn’t buy any of them. Or maybe that was me.¹ The chain was still in existence and almost 300 stores strong, but sought Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection at the end of 2014. Without a buyer, the company will close all of its stores and liquidate.

And actually, it’s not just Deb; dELiA*s is dead, and Wet Seal is shedding two-thirds of itself. This is not to say that retail targeting teens is in irreversible decline, but there seems to be a serious squeeze-out going on.

¹ [It wasn’t me.]

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A bigger Coach

There exist tags on this site for both Coach and Stuart Weitzman, which makes it almost mandatory for me to incorporate the news that the two brands are moving in together:

Footwear fanatics, rejoice: Two of your favorite labels are joining forces. In the latest fashion move, Coach has signed an agreement to purchase the Stuart Weitzman brand in a transaction valued at $574 million, WWD reports.

This is Coach’s first acquisition, and perhaps it was a wise one:

[F]ounder Stuart Weitzman and the existing management team will continue with the company to oversee the brand’s operations, working closely with Coach’s team to breathe new life into their designs.

This is not the first time Weitzman’s sold a business: after the death of his father, Weitzman and his brother sold the family shoe biz to a company in Spain. Twenty years later, Weitzman bought it back.

And maybe this is just me, but I tend to think of Coach as primarily a bag company with a shoe line on the side, so the combination of Coach and Weitzman seems to make a bit more sense than it might otherwise.

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Approved by the Bureau of Appropriate Clothing

They’ll get my hoodie when they pry it off my (up to that point) warmly insulated body:

After consulting with the Department of Public Safety, Senator Don Barrington (R-Lawton) has authored a bill that would make it unlawful to wear a mask, hood or covering during the commission of a crime or to intentionally conceal his or her identity in a public place.

There are provisions. Such as, pranks of children on Halloween, religious beliefs and special events like a parade, masquerade party or weather.

But if you wear a hood with ill intentions, you could be slapped with a misdemeanor fine of $50 to $500 and or one year in jail.

I grumbled about this earlier:

This is the epitome of “Well, let’s give the prosecutors something else to hang on ’em.” And the first time some woman in a burqa gets busted for something like shoplifting, what you’ll see hitting the fan will not be at all halal.

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