Suggested by Steph Waller:
Go into your archives and post the first sentence from the first post you made each month last year.
Okay, will do. Let’s see what sort of crumby stuff I’ve been casting on the waters:
January: “Worst titles of 2007″ contains no full sentence until the very end: “Some marginally-acceptable turns of phrase are recounted here.”
February: “The City Sentinel broadsheet is adopting a time-honored method of hyping sales: they’re cutting the price.”
March: “Space is precious in Japan, which has five times the population of Texas in about half the area.” [On unusual farming techniques.]
April: “In a lifetime of klutziness, I’ve broken lots of light bulbs, even a socket or two, usually with no ill effects other than finding that one last shard of glass three weeks later.”
May: “During a one-hour period yesterday, someone’s botnet planted about 100 bogus TrackBacks here, connected to a whole link farm full of Yahoo! 360 blogs which were probably created by a botnet.”
June: “Patterico recommends Michael J. O’Gara for Office No. 94 of the Los Angeles Superior Court.”
July: “You don’t give a damn about us, but we’re your biggest customer.” [By “you,” I mean “television.”]
August: “In my opinion, the 45 rpm record is the greatest invention in the history of popular culture because it meant that for the first time in history, anyone — especially kids — could buy art — real art — with just the change in their pockets.” [This was a blockquote from elsewhere.]
September: “I started doing this about three years ago, and it proved to be relatively popular among the readership, by which is meant that not one of them has commanded me to cut it out or face the Wrath of [insert name of presumably wrathful entity].”
October: “This odd-looking contraption is nothing more than a strap for your cell phone or other electronic gizmo, made up to look like a blood drip, available in your blood type unless you have some wacky antigen that maybe five or six people on earth share.”
November: “Yes, it’s time for another DST rant: not mine, though.”
December: “If you were wondering ‘When’s the next time we get to look at some more weird search strings?’ the answer is ‘Right about now.'”
And it’s probably as well that I do this myself from my position at the very Heart of Obscurity, for no biographer would get within three meters of this unfocused detritus.