Time once again for our weekly plunge into the wacky world of search strings, hoping that at least a few people were looking for Weird Things on the intrawebs. (Not to worry.)
Jane’s Candy Shack was a quaint shop, in a small town, with high end items that never attracted many: Once the locals found out that Jane was making them out of kale.
Pete’s disappointed with the projections of how much his cupcake cart will make in the first month: Apparently the locals have found out that Pete is making them out of kale.
peed myself on purpose: You sure it wasn’t the kale?
microsoft cannot verify the license for this product office 2010: A polite way of saying “You stinking pirate, pay up.”
pretend you’re xyzzy noodle ninja: Method acting has fallen so far these days.
stan and hilda can mow the lawn: Fine. As long as I don’t have to.
the cramped quarters migrant boat: Well, yeah. Most people don’t try to go it alone.
my parents didn steal an elephant by uriah c lasso: Come to think of it, most parents haven’t stolen elephants. Yet.
is walmart open on christmas eve: Better that you’re asking now, in January.
yogurt silly putty: Does poorly at picking up the ink from the Sunday comics.
sawiro jacayl oo qurux badan: Yeah, same to you, pal.
brandname parts, inc., makes and sells parts for the repair of major appliances. clarice suffers a loss when a defective brandname part in her freezer fails to keep the contents fresh. a statute restricts the time within which clarice may file a product liability suit once she has discovered: That all her burritos have gone bad.
glyphosate in cheerios: Brown sugar tastes better, believe me.
fox news shortest skirts: As long as they’re not on Bill O’Reilly. Or Geraldo.