Charlie, a high-school freshman, copes with his mental issues while trying to find a place to belong. He is introduced to the world of sex and drugs by senior friends, Sam and Patrick.

Meet Sam:

It appears Emma Watson, the new face of Lancôme, has put all that Hogwarts stuff behind her at last.

We’ve tried to give you so much more than the standard, out-of-the-box WordPress experience because we wanted you to understand just how powerful and pretty it could be.

To that end we’ve had our One-Click WordPress installer throw in a bunch of themes from Automattic.com (WordPress’s online parent) as well as some standard plugins to get you up and running with as little legwork required on your part as possible.

And some folks no doubt appreciate that. But then:

Turns out a lot of you just ended up deleting all of those helpful add-ons and grew quite frustrated in the process. That makes total sense because some people prefer cookie dough ice cream with sprinkles, and some people ONLY WANT VANILLA, DAMNIT.

It’s not just the flavoring, either. If you have fifty themes on site and someone manages to sneak some illicit code onto the premises, there are 49 directories it can use where you’re never going to look.

So they’ve modified the installer, and now they shovel out the extra goodies only if you check the Deluxe box. I recommend that you not do so: there’s plenty of time to mess up your site yourself without having to let the robot installer do it for you.

And anyway, the ex-underling in Doak’s office who sent the damned thing would probably rather be at the racetrack.

Logans for France and Spain are built in Casablanca, not so much for the waters, but because Morocco really, truly wanted an automobile plant of its own, and back in the 1950s the Moroccan government cut a deal with Fiat to build them a plant. Fiat eventually bailed, and Renault now owns 80 percent of the plant.

But now a second plant in Morocco, at the port of Tangier, has been opened, and Renault, nationalized after World War II and still 15-percent owned by the French Republic, is catching flak, mostly because the new Dacia Lodgy, a five- or seven-seat people mover to be built in Tangier, will sell for about half as much as Renault’s own Scénic:

“We see this factory as a dangerous development,” said Fabien Gache, head of French labor union CGT. “These vehicles are basically Loganized Scénics and Kangoos,” Gache said. “They’re bound to hit the Renault brand’s market share.” Even a former cabinet minister for [Nicolas] Sarkozy has accused Renault of “social dumping in Morocco”.

Renault’s current Kangoo is built in France, though the previous version is still being assembled in Casablanca for the Moroccan market.

For his part, Carlos Ghosn, who runs the Renault/Nissan combine, says that he never once considered building any Dacias in France, pretty much for cost reasons. If you thought the UAW was intractable and adamantine, they’re pushovers next to the French (and German) industrial unions.

Interestingly, all five of the starting Jazzmen finished in double figures, led by Al Jefferson with 20. Jefferson and Paul Millsap got 17 rebounds between them, more than the rest of the team combined; OKC won the battle of the boards, 46-32. But give the Jazz credit for moving the ball: 27 assists, while the Thunder managed only 12.

It was not Daequan Cook’s night: he put up nine of his patented long-distance bombers, and only one dropped. (The Thunder went 4-20 from Way Out There; the Jazz were 3-9; both sides shot about 47 percent overall.) But if the long jumpers weren’t falling, running to the rim paid off: Russell Westbrook was good for 28 points, Kevin Durant 19, and the bigs (Kendrick Perkins, Serge Ibaka) both had double-doubles. Perk, in fact, seemed almost buoyant at times. Nobody tell LeBron, okay?

These two teams meet again Tuesday in Oklahoma City, though this time the Thunder will have rested up a bit and the Jazz will be finishing up a back-to-back-to-back. I don’t expect anyone to be sleepwalking through that game either.

Chewing a Twizzler is like chewing wax in the shape of candy. Or the cartilage from inside your ear, if your ear was six inches long and shaped like a fusilli. When you eat the first one in the package, you think, That was ALMOST good; maybe the next one will give me the strawberry satisfaction I was hoping for. So you eat the next one and again, it reminds you of what a good candy would taste like, but it’s like you’re hearing music coming from another room that’s not quite loud enough. And so on until the package is done and you think, What was that about? Now I want some candy.

I wonder what he thinks of Red Vines.

• “Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal”: What cereal? She prefers Cocoa Pebbles;
• She hopes to be in the studio in a couple of weeks to cut the next single.

And oh, she gets tongue-tied, even today, when you bring up the Biebs.

Meanwhile, this week’s nominee for The Next Rebecca Black is Lexi Sullivan, who’s recorded a track for Patrice Wilson, whose name you’ll remember from the credits for “Friday.” “Hot Stuff,” despite its so-Seventies title, isn’t particularly awful, and Lexi can sing, but I don’t see it becoming an anthem.

Certainly Nancy Friedman, the second-smartest woman in the nation — admittedly I’ve never met the first, and I’d probably be afraid to — earned her Versatile Blogger Award, and she was kind enough to pay it forward in the general direction of Your Humble Narrator. Specifically, she said this:

In a typical week, the sole author, C. G. Hill, might cover social media, automobile tires, basketball, My Little Pony, print magazines, transportation in Oklahoma, women’s shoes, and Zooey Deschanel — all with enviable literary skill and brio.

Words like that from someone who makes a living from words — well, either I’m blushing or I’m having an amoxicillin reaction.

The rules of the game:

• In a post on your blog, nominate 15 fellow bloggers for The Versatile Blogger Award.
• In the same post, add the Versatile Blogger Award.
• In the same post, thank the blogger who nominated you in a post with a link back to their blog.
• In the same post, share 7 completely random pieces of information about yourself.
• In the same post, include this set of rules.
• Inform each nominated blogger of their nomination by posting a comment on each of their blogs. (Or tweeting.)

Seven random factoids:

1. The stack of magazines on my breakfast bar is as tall as I am — or would be, were it not subdivided into four substacks.
2. Given my limited kitchen skills, it’s perhaps a surprise that I eat out maybe once a week at most.
3. There are books in the back room that I have yet to unpack from the last move in 2003.
4. I have never owned a television set larger than 20 inches.
5. While I have made progress, I’m still entirely too susceptible to implausible impulse purchases.
6. I have an amazing capacity for denial, although it usually takes 12 to 24 hours to kick in once the Bad News is received.
7. They say the camera adds ten pounds. In that case, I’ve lost seven cameras in the past seven years.

Equally deserving, if not more so:

• Meanderings of Melanie Sherman
• The Sheila Variations [Sheila O'Malley]
• Easily Distracted [Timothy Burke]
• Dr. Boli’s Celebrated Magazine
• All Manner of Thing [C. Burrell]
• Violins and Starships
• Screwy Decimal [Rita Meade]
• Fillyjonk’s Progress
• Bayou Renaissance Man
• Incurable Insomniac [SK Waller]
• Dr. Clare’s Electronicorium Emporium
• Fragments from Floyd [Fred First]
• Ramblin’ with Roger
• Hit Coffee [Will Truman]
• Autumn People

Notifications to follow.

This is a personal note of thanks for continuing to choose T-Mobile as your wireless provider! And in light of the way customers like you stood by us, we’re eager to continue serving you as T-Mobile. Your loyalty and the outpouring of messages in support of keeping us independent were both gratifying and humbling.

Um, Phil? It’s not so much that we wanted to keep you independent — although that’s nice — as it is that we wanted to avoid That Other Company at all (or at least “any reasonable”) cost.

With the uncertainty of the potential AT&T acquisition removed, we’re rapidly moving ahead with plans to ramp up investments in ways that will benefit YOU. We’re improving the coverage and speed of our 4G network, while bringing you the very latest selection of 4G devices and great 4G plans and services for every budget. We’re also adding convenient retail locations and modernizing our current stores.

What “uncertainty”? We knew what was going to happen: (1) engulf; (2) devour. In that order.

T-Mobile is here, in fighting shape, and we’ll compete aggressively to continue earning your business and meeting your expectations.

And give Carly Foulkes a raise, wouldja please?

When it comes to total dollar value, consumer electronics make up the bulk of counterfeit goods imported into the U.S., according to Customs and Border Protection. Among the hottest items: smart phones, tablet computers and DVD or music players.

The following numbers are cited:

Value of counterfeits seized: $39 million
Retail value: $101.2 million
Percentage of total seizures: 22%

So if $101.2 million worth of stuff was faked up, and the fakes are worth $39 million — well, if I peeled off more than a couple of Franklins for a Bloo-Rae™ player worth 101.2/39 = $2.59 38.5 cents on the dollar, I’d probably have a total seizure right then and there.

(Via the Consumerist.)

Maybe it was the crowd. In the Good Old Days, the old Arco Arena sold out just about every night, and legend has it that you could hear the noise on the far side of Stockton. The Kings were lightly regarded this year: this was the only national TV appearance for which they were scheduled, and attendance was not so great earlier in the season. Did Oklahoma City misunderestimate the one-time Purple Paupers? The Kings grabbed twenty-three Thunder turnovers, had a 46-40 advantage on the glass (17-12 offensive).

Telltale statistic: the Thunder blocked 17 shots — Serge Ibaka had 10 before fouling out — and yet Sacramento rolled up 60 points in the paint. Against something like that, 33 points from Russell Westbrook and 27 from Kevin Durant (which comes to, by coincidence, 60) doesn’t help.

Oh, you wanted to know about Tyreke the Freke? Evans was speedy as ever, thank you very much, and good for 22 points. The only double-double on either side was garnered by Jason Thompson, who had 11 points and 10 boards. And in the Ferocious Big competition, DeMarcus Cousins had it all over Kendrick Perkins, who played only 19 minutes.

So the Thunder have to beat the Jazz Friday night to come back 3-2 from this road trip. We shall see.

Still, somebody missed a good bet here. As I tweeted last night: “Um, shouldn’t this stuff be at K mart?”

§15-108. Public classrooms; compliance with federal standards for media broadcasts concerning obscenity, indecency and profanity; violations; definition

A. If a person who provides classroom instruction in a public school engages in speech or conduct that would violate the standards adopted by the Federal Communications Commission concerning obscenity, indecency and profanity if that speech or conduct were broadcast on television or radio:

1. For the first occurrence, the school shall suspend the person, at a minimum, for one week of employment, and the person shall not receive any compensation for the duration of the suspension. This paragraph does not prohibit a school after the first occurrence from suspending the person for a longer duration or terminating the employment of that person.

2. For the second occurrence, the school shall suspend the person, at a minimum, for two weeks of employment, and the person shall not receive any compensation for the duration of the suspension. This paragraph does not prohibit a school after the second occurrence from suspending the person for a longer duration or terminating the employment of that person.

3. For the third occurrence, the school shall terminate the employment of the person. This paragraph does not prohibit a school after the first or second occurrence from terminating the employment of that person.

B. For the purposes of this section, “public school” means a public preschool program, a public elementary school, a public junior high school, a public middle school, a public high school, a public vocational education program, a public community college or a public university in this state.

They want to outsource state standards to the Federal Communications Commission? Are Mesa kindergartens roiling with wardrobe malfunctions? Are Flagstaff English classes being forced to read some contemporary F-bomb Fitzgerald?

Greg Lukianoff in HuffPo:

The law not only hobbles the ability to teach about sexuality and other non-Victorian topics, but it also puts teachers in jeopardy for teaching such mainstays as the Canterbury Tales, The Catcher in the Rye, certainly Ulysses, and probably every work by an obscure English writer named William Shakespeare. These days, such a law could certainly make any professor or teacher think twice about teaching Mark Twain or Kurt Vonnegut. And how on earth could you possibly teach a class about cinema studies without showing movies like The Godfather, The Graduate, Annie Hall, or for that matter, Pulp Fiction?

English, melonfarmers. Do you teach it?

I can only conclude that the Arizona pols heard about that semi-serious anti-onanism amendment in Oklahoma and thought they’d lose their place at the front of the Idjit Lejislators line.

This custom-crafted plush Derpy went on eBay this week, complete with all the pertinent accessories: mailbag, one piece of mail, and a muffin, the latter two items magnetized so she can be posed actually carrying them, upon hoof or in mouth. There’s even a little electronic voice box that plays back the closest thing she has to a catchphrase (see post title). About halfway through the description, I heard the little WANT buzzer going off in the back of my head, so I went off to the auction and crossed my fingers.

Perhaps this was not the best idea I’d ever had. I did, however, keep the Visa sheathed, inasmuch as the Derpster here is eventually going to sell for somewhere upwards of $700, or Luna knows how many pony dollars. Me, I’m just a fan.

Suppose Ferris Bueller never actually existed.

Most of your fictional characters didn’t, but okay, we’ll play along.

The parade float. That’s just silly. And Ferris never gets in trouble. He never has any actual plans for staying out of trouble, nor does he show good judgment or skill at staying out of trouble, but the boom is never lowered on him. The reason is, he isn’t there; he lives inside Cameron’s head. Cameron’s just a lonely bored guy with nothing going on, so he imagines everything.

I don’t want to talk about Fight Club here, but that sounds awfully Tyler Durdenesque: see, for instance, this MetaTalk thread.

(You’re still here? It’s over. Go home. Go.)

Since it is no particular secret that I’m a sucker for the classic little black dress, even when half of it is actually sort of blue, I went scraping through several dozen sources trying to find a shot where she’s standing. I did find one, but apparently she wasn’t happy about something:

Come to think of it, the dress isn’t all that wonderful either. Maybe the person in the second shot is actually the evil twin from Ringer.

Their two-story, 2,650-square-foot house will be constructed from almost entirely recycled materials, including five shipping containers — two on bottom and three on top, built upon a 40-by-40-foot slab facing southwest.

They are, of course, blogging the construction. Last week, the second container arrived on site:

The shipping list from its last voyage is still attached to the door. It hauled furniture, 22 chocolate brown sofas, 16 love-seats, 9 chairs, and 6 ottomans, to be exact. That’s more furniture than we will probably have in all five of our containers!

They’re hoping to have the housewarming, or at least the first-story-warming, in December.

Now this would be noteworthy:

Behold Zooey Deschanel, five foot six, and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, five foot twenty-six. Kareem uploaded this picture himself yesterday; Zooey noted that she was wearing four-inch heels at the time.

And you know, he looks pretty darn good for almost 65, if you ask me.

Always more subtle than I, the Instant Man has his own recommendation for politicians of this mindset:

I think these people should be exposed to toddler snot, then locked in a freezing basement with a bag of ragweed pollen tied over their head until they develop a proper appreciation for the consequences of their policies.

Of course, once they start sneezing, I’m content. And let’s face it, we’re never going to run out of toddler snot.

Teleflora’s “big game” ad essentially suggested there are women out there who will prostitute themselves for a nice bunch of flowers.

So after that, I had to watch the silly thing, and while Adriana Lima always brightens up the scene, the quid pro quo premise rubbed me the wrong way, so to speak.

It did not help that a couple of hours earlier I’d seen “Secret of My Excess,” in which Spike’s avarice runs amok: the little so-and-so even steals leaves, fercryingoutloud. If a baby dragon can learn that it’s better to give than to receive, so can your average davenport tuber watching football.

The Thunder had a few numbers of their own: Kevin Durant dropped in 33 points, Westbrook 31, and Daequan Cook went 5-6 from distance for 17. OKC shot 52.4 percent from the field, made 11 of 26 three-pointers, and 20 of 21 from the stripe. (Sixth man James Harden got 19 points, one more than the Warrior bench in aggregate.)

The Warriors, though, had shot close to 60 percent all night, and finished at 55. They made 9 of 21 treys, and had a 36-33 edge in rebounding. Stephen Curry turned in a double-double (16 points, 10 assists).

One could say, I suppose, that the hard part of the series is over: having beaten the Warriors in Oakland twice, there’s only one more game, and that in OKC. Still, one should not underestimate this team. You know Monta Ellis isn’t tired yet.

The West Coast Death March continues Thursday at Sacramento, then Friday at Utah.

[T]he added northbound and southbound lanes would be open only to those willing to pay a toll, to transit buses, to registered van pools and to emergency vehicles.

But the real departure would be the nature of the tolls themselves, which would change minute by minute depending on the level of traffic in the lane. The point … would be to keep the toll at a level calibrated to keep speeds in the lane at 50 mph or more.

If traffic gets too thick and traffic begins to slow, the toll would instantly increase in an effort to discourage some people from choosing to use the express lane. Signs well upstream of the express lane entrances would alert people to the current toll rate.

Since traffic on MoPac is occasionally moving a lot slower than 50 mph — sometimes it’s not moving at all — people might be willing to pay quite a bit to get up some speed. Chris Bradford thinks it’s a swell idea:

This is how we ought to add new capacity. It will make everyone better off. The people who choose to pay the toll will be better off because they value the time savings more than the cost of the toll. Bus commuters will be better off — they might be the biggest beneficiaries, in fact — because they will get a suddenly much shorter commute for (I presume) the same bus fare. Drivers who continue to use the free lanes will endure slightly less congestion, even if it’s just a narrower period of peak congestion. Finally, taxpayers, if not better off, will be no worse off because they won’t have to pay for the extra capacity. The capacity will be paid by those who value and use it.

How much would this toll be?

Wilbur Smith Associates, which has been doing traffic and revenue studies on the project for the [Central Texas Regional] Mobility Authority, has indicated to officials that the project would be financially feasible with a top rate initially of $2.57 in 2011 dollars. Since the road wouldn’t open until 2016, that would equate to about $3 on opening day. Officials emphasized that the actual toll rates have not been set yet and that Wilbur Smith later will produce a more rigorous “investment-grade” study.

During periods of low or no congestion — I am told that such exist — the toll might be as low as 50 cents.

So drivers will be faced with a choice. Bradford explains:

[T]he congestion cost each driver imposes on his fellow drivers will be approximately equal to the price of driving in the congestion-free lane. That’s one of the quirks of the economics of congestion — it turns out that the cost of congestion a driver imposes is equal to the congestion-clearing price.

Which seems counterintuitive, but it seems to work in real life.

Now my supplier of choice is Tire Rack, so I dialed up their Web site and punched in the appropriate size. Of the first ten tires listed, four were out of stock and one was available in limited quantities. (More alarming: the tire I bought last time out, which I’d happily buy again, is no longer being made in my size/performance combination, and this brand’s one offering, a tire I consider to be a downgrade, actually costs more.)

Fortunately, I don’t need tires right this minute — current rubber has only about 30k on it and the wear bars are still fairly far away — but I will not be a happy camper if this situation prevails for too much longer, especially if prices are soaring.