What I’m sputtering about is the lack of different inseam lengths in women’s pants. Men get a choice. At Atwoods, one of the better stores for jeans selection, I personally have seen men’s jeans with inseam lengths from 26 to 38 inches in waist sizes from 28 inches all the way up to “OMG! I didn’t know elephants wear pants!” Some of those sizes might not be common but the point is, if you guys need pants with a 50 inch waist and a 30 inch inseam or with a 30 inch waist and a 38 inch inseam, they do exist.
Dave Barry, as it happens, knew this all along:
A man will try on a pair of pants, and if the pants are too small, he’ll try on a larger pair, and when he finds a pair that fits, he buys them. Most men do not spend a lot of time fretting about the size of their pants. Many men wear jeans with the size printed right on the back label so that if you’re standing behind a man in a supermarket line, you can read his waist and inseam size. A man could have, say, a 52-inch waist and a 30-inch inseam, and his label will proudly display that information, which is basically the same thing as having a sign that says: “Howdy! My butt is the size of a FedEx truck!”
It occurs to me that if his butt were the size of a FedEx truck, you wouldn’t need a label to tell you so.
On the other, um, hand, none of us guys wear a size -2.