For to carry you home

Things you need to know about Oklahoma’s soon-to-be-designated State Gospel Song:

  • Composer “Uncle” Wallace Willis was one of the Choctaw Freedmen, emancipated after the Civil War by treaty between Washington and the Choctaw Nation. “Swing Low Sweet Chariot” dates to somewhere in the 1840s.
  • You can hear echoes of “Swing Low” in Dvořák’s Symphony No. 9, “From the New World.” Maybe.
  • And yes, Zooey Deschanel has sung it.

Senate Bill 73, by Eason McIntyre (D-Tulsa), which passed the Senate 46-1, should have no trouble in the House. (The, um, “1″ was Josh Brecheen, R-Coalgate, who is not the sharpest tool in the shed, if you know what I mean.)

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Zooeypalooza 9!

We’ve gone too long without one of these, wouldn’t you say?

Zooeypalooza 9!

Embiggenment of individual photos can be had with a click.

Previous Paloozas: ZP 1, ZP 2, ZP 3, ZP 4, ZP 5, ZP 6, ZP 7, and ZP 8.

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Gimme a ticket for an aeroplane

You know the song already. It’s direct and to the point, but the potential for rudeness is on the high side, as Zooey Deschanel is compelled to point out:

To whom are you explaining all of this? The ticket agent? FYI the ticket agent definitely doesn’t care why you’re buying a plane ticket. The ticket agent just wants your money, not your explanations.

On t’other hand, “The Letter” was written by Wayne Carson Thompson, who also wrote this, so sivilizing him, Mark Twain-style, may prove to be a bit more complicated than she anticipated.

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All the retro-cute you could want

Yeah, her again. He’s there too.

I trust this requires no explanation.

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Because, you know, she’s a doll

Zooey Deschanel in doll form:

Zooey Deschanel doll by Madame Alexander

A variation on the Madame Alexander “Happy Birthday, Wendy” theme.

(Via, um, Zooey Deschanel.)

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Zooeypalooza 8!

Okay, just one more before the end of the year.

Zooeypalooza 8!

You may be able to get larger versions of some of these with a simple click.

Previously seen: ZP 1, ZP 2, ZP 3, ZP 4, ZP 5, ZP 6, and ZP 7.

Disclosure: One of these outfits you’ve seen before, but in a different shot.

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Zooey has lawyers

And while they’re not coming after me, so far as I know, they’re definitely zeroing in on Steve Madden:

Actress Zooey Deschanel, best known for her turn in the Will Ferrell movie Elf, is suing shoe designer Steve Madden for a $2,000,000 breach of contract.

The deal was made to use Zooey’s likeness and name in a line of shoes and accessories, cleverly named ‘Zooey shoes & accessories’.

Why the deal fell through, I don’t know, though BNET’s Jim Edwards offers a possible explanation:

Here’s some speculation: Although Deschanel is a luminous and appealing screen presence, she’s not that famous.

Emphasis added. And, well, you can’t say I’m not doing my part.

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Compounding the issue

I’ve never made any particular secret of the fact that I am not overly fond of Valentine’s Day. (Translation: “I whine about it at least once a year.”) And maybe it’s a trifle early to start grumbling about it, but I really must pass on this story of how it’s done in Japan:

A trifecta of confectionery-as-symbol-of-affection-or-ambivalence holidays begins on Valentine’s day, when the girls give chocolate to the boys they like (YEAH GIRL POWER!). This chocolate giving is followed by a month (A WHOLE MONTH!) of suspense, because it is not until March 14th, Marshmallow day, that the male receivers of chocolate can tell the girls whether they like them or not. They let the ladies know by giving them either marshmallows, which means, “Girl, I like you,” or some sweet thing that is not marshmallows, say, cookies, which mean politely, “no thanks.” Really it’s a long time to wait, but marshmallows or cookies, it’s a win/win, because if he’s not into you, you still get some cookies or something. A month later there is a holiday, which is not quite as clear to me, Licorice day, where all the single people (the people who didn’t get marshmallows) are celebrated with licorice.

I’ll be watching the mailbox for a jar of turmeric.

And maybe it’s not too early after all; Kroger already has Easter candy out, fercrissake.

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One of those California gurls

So I gave myself an assignment for Rule 5 this week: a picture of Katy Perry that does not remind me of Zooey Deschanel, since, you know, they look so much alike and all.

This seems to fill the bill quite nicely:

Katy Perry

Although if Zooey wants to wear something this short, I’ll be happy to post a correction.

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Hence the word “Marvel”

Dear God, another Zooey story, and this time Peter Parker is involved:

Deschanel would reportedly star in the Spider-Man reboot as Elizabeth “Betty” Brant, the assistant to Peter’s fast-talking, hard-edged boss J. Jonah Jameson at the Daily Bugle. Actress Elizabeth Banks dyed her blonde locks brown to play the character in Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man trilogy, but Miss Brant was never a major player in those films. Showbiz Spy indicates that that could change in [Marc] Webb’s reboot and claims that the director has “big plans” for the character and “wants a strong performer to carry the role and Zooey fits the bill perfectly. The role is hers if she wants it.”

At least it’s not Katy Perry.

(Via Fark.)

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Zooeypalooza 7!

It’s not like I’ve forgotten or anything.

Zooeypalooza 7!

Click any section to embiggen.

What has gone before: ZP 1, ZP 2, ZP 3, ZP 4, ZP 5, and ZP 6.

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We are indeed blessed

Not a Zooeypalooza entry, but worth the effort, especially since the Twitterverse (and others) made a point of telling me about it.

Note: This was posted without the express written consent of Major League Baseball.

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Architecture as date bait

We’ve already tackled this from one angle, the desirability (if any) of dating actual architects. Now famed human-relations expert Steve Sailer proposes that guys develop, or at least feign, an interest in the local buildings:

Architecture is aesthetic, yet manly. Not that many girls know much about architecture relative to their other aesthetic interests, but they are naggingly aware that they should know more. (Obviously, if you live in Chicago, you will have more to talk about than if you live in Palmdale, so your mileage may vary.) For example, the recent indie romantic-drama hit, 500 Days of Summer, uses architectural fandom, with LA’s rather spotty downtown carefully framed to look like downtown Chicago, as the basis for a rather nerdy young man’s appeal to Zooey Deschanel.

An interest in architecture also provides a high-minded excuse to talk about what every 20 or 30 something is actually fascinated by: real estate. What neighborhoods will go up in value, which ones down? Architecture appreciation provides an excuse to stroll around gentrifying but still slightly edgy neighborhoods on cheap dates.

In support of this premise, I note that one of the few social events to earn a permanent spot on my calendar is the local AIA’s annual Architecture Tour, and that Trini enjoys it greatly: between the two of us, we seem to ask the right questions and peer into the most interesting corners. Not that either of us think of it as a “cheap date,” necessarily.

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Another previous topic recycled

Is it possible, or is it not possible, to ride a bicycle while wearing high heels? We’ve had this discussion before, with perhaps inconclusive results.

Warren Meyer of Coyote Blog weighs in with his own observation:

Single impression I will hold from Milan: Very attractive women dressed to the nines in chic outfits wearing 5-inch heels — all while riding a bicycle. They are all over the place.

The definitive answer to this question probably will not be forthcoming any time soon. I suppose I should have asked Zooey Deschanel when I had the chance.

Zooey Deschanel and bicycle

Then again, it’s not like she’d have been happy to see me.

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Zooeypalooza 6!

It’s been almost two months, so…

Zooeypalooza 6!

Larger versions are a click away. In case you missed them: ZP 1, ZP 2, ZP 3, ZP 4, and ZP 5.

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Creepy Old Guy mode

Stacy McCain has the video of David Letterman’s apparent first encounter with Zooey Deschanel, and regarding Dave’s tendency to perv on the female guests, he remarks:

The thing is, before the sexual harassment stuff made headlines, I’d always thought of Letterman’s hubba-hubba routine with female guests (e.g., famously, Drew Barrymore) as a sort of ironic sarcasm thing. But the geezerly nudge-wink ceased to be funny after we discoverd that Letterman’s been shagging the office help since … well, forever.

Then again, Drew was up to the task of taking matters into her own hands.

Extra bonus perviance: In McCain’s comment section, the topic briefly turns to, um, me.

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Not that I expect anyone to do this

Many sites have a FAQ file, for those frequently-asked questions. (Being on a lower plane of existence, I have a collection of occasionally-asked questions.) Once in a while, though, I have to fake up answer a question that was never asked at all, such as this:

“How can I get myself into one of your ____paloozas?”

Which, inevitably, means “How can I look like Zooey Deschanel?” The answer is here.

(Passed to me by the vacationing Uncapped in Uxbridge. Purely by coincidence, when the link arrived here, I was listening to She & Him.)

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Your girlfriend wants steak

Zooey Deschanel is abandoning the whole vegetarian thing:

[She] gave up meat some years ago but recently turned her back on her vegetarian and non-dairy regimen after discovering she couldn’t eat soy or wheat products.

She tells Bust magazine, “I gave it a good try, but sometimes you just need a little something, a little meat.”

Last I heard, husband Ben Gibbard, leader of Death Crab Cab for Cutie, would eat seafood, but nothing mammalian.

(Via Fark. You may have seen me tweet this earlier.)

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Zooeypalooza 5!

Okay, is there anyone here who hasn’t figured these out yet?

Zooeypalooza 5!

As always, click to embiggen. For further viewing pleasure: ZP 1, ZP 2, ZP 3, and ZP 4.

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Safety considerations aside

Breda happened upon this still from Yes Man, and observes: “Zooey Deschanel nails that New Shooter grin.”

Yes indeedy:

Zooey Deschanel on the gun range

Looks vaguely Palin-esque in a way, if you ask me.

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