For a previous Vent, I spent some time answering one of those semi-serious journalers surveys, the sort that seem to be thought up by — and generally answered by — twentysomethings with varying degrees of angst. Being far from twentysomething, and being at a relatively high level of angst, I probably should have thought of something better to do here, but what the hell: it's a look inside the mind, and it doesn't require me to worry a whole lot about my sentence structure. And I thank Nora for putting this up where I could see it and swipe it.

1. If you could build a house anywhere, where would it be?

I seem to change my mind on this every month or so, but right now, I'm thinking about southern New Jersey, or maybe northeastern Connecticut.

2. What's your favorite article of clothing?

In the best, or at least warmest, of all possible worlds, I would do without, but this isn't going to happen, so: I am devoted to the pocket T as a class, and I keep half a dozen of them on call at all times.

3. Favorite physical features of the opposite sex?

I'm pretty much a leg man.

4. What's the last CD that you bought?

A reissue of Jethro Tull's Benefit, though I have just ordered Fly on the Wall by Red-Letter.

5. Where's your least favorite place to be?

At the corner of 42nd and Treadmill, where I spend a minimum of forty hours a week, forty-nine weeks a year.

6. Where's your favorite place to be massaged?

Um, insufficient data.

7. What's most important, strong in mind or strong in body?

I can deal with physical weakness, which seems to be arriving here on schedule, but brain death scares me. Especially mine.

8. What time do you wake in the morning?

The time that matters — that is, the time I finally get out of bed — is about 5:55 am. Later on weekends. Much later, if possible.

9. What's your favorite kitchen appliance?

Other than the Big Stuff (dishwasher, fridge, what have you), I'd have to say the George Foreman Grill, though it's a pain in the neck to keep clean.

10. What makes you really angry?

Blatant stupidity, especially if (1) it causes me extra work or (2) it's my own. Quadruple discredit if both.

11. If you could play any instrument, what would it be?

I took piano when I was eight or nine, about the age most kids I knew took piano, and there are times when I really regret not continuing.

12. Favorite color?

Really dark greens, most browns.

13. Do you prefer sports car or SUV?

So long as I don't actually have to haul anything, sports car.

14. Do you believe in afterlife?

I tend to doubt it, and all else being equal, I think I'd be happier if there weren't.

15. Favorite children's book?

I still break up a little bit at The Velveteen Rabbit. Tell anyone and you die.

16. What is your favorite season?

Spring, so long as I'm in Oklahoma. Otherwise summer.

17. What's your least favorite household chore?

Cleaning the oven, followed closely by tending to grout discolorations.

18. If you could have one super power?

I'd definitely like to be able to disappear on demand.

19. If you have a tattoo, what is it?

Not applicable.

20. Can you juggle?

For about three seconds.

21. The one person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to?

Let's call her Jeannie.

22. What's your favorite day?

Saturday, unless I have to work.

23. What's in the trunk of your car?

A box containing a flashlight, a gallon of premixed coolant, two quarts of motor oil, a bottle of brake fluid, a drop cloth, and half a roll of paper towels.

24. Which do you prefer, sushi or hamburger?

I prefer my seafood actually done, thank you.
The Vent

#305
13 August 2002

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