13 February 2004
The drought has reached Nowata
People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, apparently satisfied with having trashed the memory of Dr Robert Atkins, has gone back to its primary function: haranguing perfectly innocent towns into changing their names.
In years past, they've concentrated on New York towns: first Fishkill, then Hamburg. (How they managed to miss the Catskill Mountains is beyond me, especially since they went there to pester producers of foie gras.) Now they've turned their attention to Oklahoma, and the town of Slaughterville, south of Norman, which is of course named after grocer James Slaughter.
Other towns in Oklahoma which probably should fear for their identities:
Battiest: Insults persons with psychological disorders. (Actually, it's pronounced "bah-TEEST".)
Beaver: Offensive to women. (See Beaver College oops, Arcadia University.)
Bowlegs: Mocks a
Bushyhead: No comment.
Kremlin: Obviously a leftover KGB plant.
Slapout: Promotes violence.
Warr Acres: Promotes lots of violence.
Yukon: Named after a sport-utility vehicle.
And God forbid anyone should spell Tulsa backwards.
(Muchas gracias: Cam Edwards.)
(Update, 18 February: Slaughterville says "Neigh"...er, "Nay".)