Discounts, schmiscounts

This is why you (and by “you,” I mean “I”) shop where you do:

I try to get the shopping done before noon on Sunday. Mostly to avoid human interaction. Which means I will have to avoid Whole Foods for a good 2 years after construction is complete. The only other shoppers at Homeland on Britton and May at such an early hour are old people.

Such is not the case after 5 p.m. Do all hot little 20-somethings go to yoga class immediately preceding a trip to the grocery store? Or is the constant parade of tight behinds covered by painted-on black stretchy pants just a ruse to cause me certain embarrassment and a potential sexual harassment lawsuit?

As a practicing old person — not that it requires a hell of a lot of effort to keep up the practice — I can testify that around 3 pm on a Saturday, that very same store is a hotbed, so to speak, of highly-observable forty- and fiftysomethings. I assume that the men in their lives are at that moment glued to the sofa, remote in one hand, brewski in the other.


  1. Kim »

    7 January 2011 · 10:26 pm

    The girlies aren’t my type but the “gin and miracle whip” simile was a hoot regarding OU b-ball. Heh.

  2. fillyjonk »

    8 January 2011 · 7:42 am

    Huh. I guess my town really IS “family friendly.” After 3 pm, in the big grocery here, ALL you see are tired moms (and a few dads) with squalling kids. And after 6 pm or so, it’s packs of teens roaming the wal-mart, because we do not have a mall.

    I try, as much as possible, to shop early Saturday morning. Or I go to the “little” grocery store near me, it doesn’t seem to attract the sorts of people I find it difficult to shop around.

  3. CGHill »

    8 January 2011 · 10:37 am

    I can’t remember the last time I saw someone under 18 in that Homeland store. Maybe it’s just the timing.

  4. sya »

    8 January 2011 · 1:02 pm

    I suddenly have the urge to make a note of the demographics every time I go to the grocery store.

    The only time I consistently try to avoid is Saturdays. Stores tend to be packed like sardines then.

  5. fillyjonk »

    8 January 2011 · 5:34 pm

    Any day when I walk into a grocery and find they are giving out free food samples, I turn around and walk back out. Because not only will traffic patterns in the store be screwed up, but somehow, every food-mooch in town KNOWS there’s free food and descends upon the store.

    there’s a reason why my Sam’s Club membership expired.

RSS feed for comments on this post