For certain values of “no one”

Mashable has something up called “This Is Why No One Follows You on Twitter,” which gives ten possible reasons why no one follows you on Twitter. Last I looked, I had about 820 followers, which isn’t Bieberesque or anything, but it isn’t exactly “no one” either.

So what are we doing wrong? This item certainly does not apply:

4. Your following ratio is disproportionate.

It’s understandable — and expected — that you’ll follow more accounts than are following you, but a large disparity in these numbers makes your profile look suspicious.

I follow about 650. Go figure.

Then there’s this:

8. Robots craft your tweets.

If your recent tweets look like they were automatically generated, people aren’t going to follow you.

What people want on Twitter is to hear your genuine voice, in real time. They don’t want lofty quotes that you’ve scheduled to go live at strategic periods, stats from your latest workout or what your “top stories” are via a third-party curation service.

Well, I admit to about five auto-tweets a day — this post generated one, as does every post — but I also admit to twenty that are produced live.

Still: twenty-five tweets a day?

6. You tweet too much.

Twitter went live mid-2006. If you joined the microblogging site at launch and tweeted three times a day every day since then, you would have penned around 8,000 tweets.

Which was about 39,600 tweets ago.

(Via Donna Serdula, who has twelve thousand followers.)


  1. fillyjonk »

    3 October 2013 · 2:36 pm

    Good Lord, how many “We are going to tell you how everything you do on the Internet, you are doing wrong” articles are out there?

    I guess harsh judgments are our major export now.

  2. CGHill »

    3 October 2013 · 3:10 pm

    I consider this sort of thing on par with the goobers who offer to boost my Google ranking. (Inevitably, I find that I’m already far higher than they are.)

  3. McGehee »

    4 October 2013 · 6:41 am

    My follow ratio is even more upside-down than yours, Charles. Of course, my followers still number less than your followings.

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