Billed for Ted’s excrement adventure

Welcome back, my friends, to the sideshow that never ends:

Although my still-aboveground “temporary” line remains in place and uncut, meaning I have television and internet service, I can no longer watch Turner Classic Movies or baseball playoffs on the Turner Broadcasting System channel. I also can’t watch CNN, Headline News, Boomerang and the Cartoon Network, but I usually didn’t.

As my Cable One communications rep whined to me in an e-mail the other day and the Cable One CEO has been whining on commercials while wearing a stylish regular-guy denim shirt, darned old Turner wanted a tremendous price increase to carry channels with declining ratings. I now probably owe all of you a new keyboard, since charging lots of money for channels nobody watches in order for them to watch the half dozen or so they want is in fact Cable One’s business model.

For “tremendous,” read “nearly 50 percent,” as the whining CEO whined.

On the one hand, I figure it’s a Good Thing that this squabble is occurring out in the open, rather than behind closed doors in the presence of an FCC drone. But it’s a rerun, dammit. We’ve seen this dozens of times before and it always ends the same way: the warring parties kiss and make up, and dollars are hoovered from your pocket to pay for their reunion party.


  1. McGehee »

    8 October 2013 · 8:56 am

    It usually works because usually people don’t have the option of switching to an alternative carrier; thus the increased cost can be passed on whole to the victim subscriber.

    A carrier with competitors might feel pressure to hold rates down, thus having more spine to resist the content provider’s demands.

  2. CGHill »

    8 October 2013 · 9:20 am

    Brad Templeton reminds us:

    Cable is not a monopoly. You can choose from any cable company you want in America, just by moving your house.

    So there.

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