Strange search-engine queries (428)

The Polar Vortex rears its ugly head, or heads its ugly rear, and once again we bring in the logs, not so much for warmth as for amusement value.

protege valve body:  Truth be told, I’m still snickering about the possibility of a protege valve: one can only take so many of them, I suppose.

thad balkman adultry case:  Never heard of it, though I will concede the possibility that Balkman is in fact an adult, and probably not a baseball mascot in the Sally League.

brown shoed square:  Make it a cube if he uses the word “cordovan.”

Brussel practice of kung fu Vedio:  Even if the Euroweenies are doing martial arts, I assure you, I don’t want to see it.

entirely symbolic:  For instance, the middle of the “wish sandwich” in “Rubber Biscuit.”

is 2000 mazda 626 v6 automatic a better trans than the 4 cylinder auto trans:  If you define “better” as “harder to fix,” then yes.

ARE WE HAVING FUNDS YET? Solution:  You solve this by, um, obtaining funds. I would think that would have been obvious.

many people hang up on telemarketers but other will listen politely to their pictures even though they are not interested in the product. know that any one who agrees:”  is probably silly enough to think pictures (except motion pictures) can be listened to, politely or otherwise.

I use the 5 speed gearbox Ford Escape for mazda tribute:  Yes, but do you wear sunglasses at night?

what is fair to all corncerd of the four way test:  If everybody gets 25 percent, but thinks he got 30.

what does the fax say:  Not much, though it screeches a helluva lot.


  1. backwoods conservative »

    14 April 2014 · 9:26 am

    Maybe the fax would be able to say more if it had some pictures.

  2. canadienne »

    14 April 2014 · 9:40 am


  3. CGHill »

    14 April 2014 · 10:08 am

    Take the least effective, most obnoxious member of the Canadian parliament. Now take away 5 IQ points and add two or three TV preachers’ worth of self-righteousness. You’ll come close to the walking debacle that is the Euroweenie.

  4. canadienne »

    14 April 2014 · 10:10 am

    Could you give me an example of an Euroweenie?

    Also that description sounds a bit more like the mayor of Toronto.

  5. canadienne »

    14 April 2014 · 10:55 am

    Most of the people I met in Brussels just seemed like everyone else, although I did not meet Jean Claude Van Damme.

  6. canadienne »

    14 April 2014 · 11:00 am

    Ah, I googled it:
    Now I get it although I still don’t know any of them.

  7. CGHill »

    14 April 2014 · 11:06 am

    Rob Ford is in bad need of redeeming social value. (As I understand his politics, he’s formally part of the PC, but Toronto is nonpartisan in these matters, so he waddles all over the map.)

    In terms of sheer dumbth, though, you might want to go with Alberto Nadal, Spain’s Secretary of State for Energy, who came up with a scheme to tax sunlight — more precisely, to tax users of solar panels so that they’re paying no less than market rates for power. Now that’s a weenie.

  8. CGHill »

    14 April 2014 · 11:10 am

    As for the Urban Dictionary definition — well, they did pick a pretty good exemplar: John Kerry, who incidentally served in Vietnam, is known these days for coming up with harebrained schemes, not a quality one truly desires in a Secretary of State.

  9. Charles Pergiel »

    15 April 2014 · 6:59 pm

    what does the fax say: Not much, though it screeches a helluva lot.

    I had a gig working with fax modems for awhile. You could usually get a fax to “connect” if you whistled some random bit of noise into the phone, then you could listen to the pictures, which sounded just like white noise. Good times.

  10. CGHill »

    15 April 2014 · 9:31 pm

    I think I would be driven mad, were I exposed to more than a few seconds of that.

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