For as long as I can remember, the back page of the Oklahoma Gazette, the local sort-of-alt-weekly, has been purchased by the local BMW dealer to showcase the current lease deals. After a while, they start to blur: all those Bimmers look pretty much the same. Jack Baruth is happy to explain one of the reasons why:
Let’s put aside for a minute the staggering historical ignorance in thinking that German cars have always been limited to non-colors. After all, the Porsches of the Sixties and the Audis of the Seventies came in colors from lime green to light tan and at no time was the integrity of the German people harmed in any way as a result. Trabants were always wacky colors and that was despite East Germany being pretty much a collection of unheated concrete buildings. The monochromization of the Fatherland’s automobiles didn’t start in earnest until it became possible to lease them cheaply and all the newbies wanted a silver BMW with the lowest possible payment. What can you do about that? It sucks and that’s why when you drive by your local Bimmer dealer the colorful Bavarias and 320is of yesteryear have been replaced by a line of grey blobs with BMW Financial’s preferred package of auction-friendly equipment.
Well, this week they have an X1 sDrive28i in actual red for $359 for 36 months, and while this is the Bimmer toward which I am most favorably disposed, I refuse to pay actual money for anything with an asinine label like “sDrive28i.” (MSRP, if you’re asking, is $36,650.) And apparently this ad is updated piecemeal, when it’s updated at all, because some of these deals expired on the first of August, the rest on the first of September. Cover date is the third of September. (The bottom-feeder 320i, offered for $309, is indeed in silver, or a very shiny grey.)