Quote of the week

In Iraq War 3.0, whose boots will actually be on the ground? A prediction by nemo paradise:

So, if the Kurds (excellent cavalrymen all, and demonstrably fierce warriors) and the “Iraqi security forces” (who, when they last encountered ISIS, ran like scalded dogs, littering the battlefield with weapons ranging from pistols and rifles to armored personnel carriers and field artillery) are going to do the actual fighting, what is left for the US/Euro coalition?

According to our sources, the following assignments are contemplated:

U.S.: Carpet-bombing.
Britain: Blathering and pettifoggery.
France: Catering.
Australia: Loud insults.
Canada: Snowplows.
Germany: Beer.
Turkey: Colorful banners.
Italy: White flags.
Poland: Paprika.
Denmark: Skis and luges.

At least they’re contributing in the way they know best. I am minded of General Schwarzkopf’s comment on our catering-minded ally: “Going to war without the French is like going deer hunting without your accordion.”


  1. Tatyana »

    7 September 2014 · 10:19 pm

    Hungarians! Paprika is Magyar preoccupation, not Polish!
    Besides, what are they all missing is Polish vodka (and obscenities. Only Russian obscenities are more powerful than Polish ones – and Russians have, once again, managed to quarrel with the rest of the world)

  2. Tatyana »

    7 September 2014 · 10:26 pm

    ..[and thus taken themselves out of all civilized coalitions, that’s what I mean]

  3. McGehee »

    8 September 2014 · 10:08 am

    Well, okay, as long as we only bomb the carpets and don’t scratch the linoleum.

  4. Roger Green »

    8 September 2014 · 11:48 am

    Kielbasa! I love Polish kielbasa.

  5. fillyjonk »

    8 September 2014 · 11:55 am

    Considering the post just above this one, maybe we need someone to dump a bunch of confetti and then turn on a hose.

  6. Charles Pergiel »

    8 September 2014 · 12:10 pm

    I never go deer hunting without my accordion.

  7. jsallison »

    8 September 2014 · 8:27 pm

    Ah I see I’ve been beaten handily to the punch, Polska kielbasa and Magyar paprika.

    Would that we had the stones to actually carpet bomb. You haven’t won until your enemy knows in his bones that it’s over. Precision pinpricks don’t do it. If they want jihad we really need to show them how that tune is played.

  8. Mel »

    9 September 2014 · 3:30 am

    I was going to add that Catering is very important. After reading the previous comments, I’m even more convinced.

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