Advice to the youngsters

Asked for advice by a recent grad who says he’s hauling in 60k a year after taxes but continues to occupy his parents’ basement, Bark M. comes up with an eminently sensible set of proposals:

  1. Move out from your parents’ house into a nice, upscale apartment for about $1200/month.
  2. Allocate about $400/month for groceries, and another $400/month for utilities.
  3. Get some silk sheets.
  4. Download Tinder.
  5. Spend lots of money on alcohol and dating. Get laid as much as possible. You’re only young and single once.
  6. Give yourself about $900/month to spend on a car, including insurance.
  7. Save a grand each month since an H-1B worker who lied about his certifications on his application will replace you at your tech job.

Some of these, I suspect, were delivered with tongue in cheek.


  1. fillyjonk »

    8 April 2016 · 5:23 am

    I’m thinking 7 wasn’t a joke.

    I have a cousin who wound up in that boat. Luckily, he was able to get a new job in a part of the country that is apparently less attractive to recent immigrants.

    ($60K after taxes and he’s still living with his parents? I hope they’re charging him a stiff rend.)

  2. Jay »

    8 April 2016 · 12:01 pm

    Been telling our kids for years that as soon as they were out of school, Mom and Dad are downsizing to a place with no basement. They will be expected to get their own job, and their own place to live, be it their own house, an apartment, a tent off in the woods or a sleeping bag under the overpass, what ever they are able to work for and provide on their own. Been also telling them that whatever they want to study in college, make sure they learn something other people are willing to pay them for. (and been keeping our fingers crossed…)

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