Government, we have learned, is capable of vast acts of sheer stupidity; but for sheer crassness, you pretty much have to turn to nonprofits, especially nonprofits who really, really need publicity.

PETA thinks this nickname is just horrible:

Like many others, we’ve been enthusiastically following your career, and we thought we’d send you a gift of delicious vegan steaks and burgers in the hope that you’ll consider adopting a kinder, healthier vegan lifestyle, which would pave the way for a new nickname: Andrew “Tofu” Johnston.

Your new nickname would also raise awareness of the urgent need to move towards a cruelty-free lifestyle to offset the worst effects of climate change. According to the United Nations, animal agriculture is “one of the top two or three most significant contributors to the most serious environmental problems, at every scale from local to global.”

Persuaded as I am that one of the most serious environmental problems is the continued existence of the United Nations, I would turn them down for political reasons. Beef takes a simpler approach:

Besides, one of his sponsors is Arby’s, which isn’t telling you loudly “WE HAVE THE SALADS.”

(Via Legal Insurrection.)


  1. fillyjonk »

    7 August 2016 · 7:36 am

    Busybodies: is there nothing they think they can’t do?

  2. fillyjonk »

    7 August 2016 · 8:57 am

    though of course this probably falls under the “any outrageous thing we can do gets us attention and publicity” for PETA and unfortunately that seems to work so we get increasingly more of it.

    There’s a v. small town near here called Butcher Pen. I’d hate to hear what PETA would suggest they change their name to.

  3. CGHill »

    7 August 2016 · 10:40 am

    Well, they’ve already complained about Slaughterville.

  4. jsallison »

    7 August 2016 · 4:06 pm

    Veg ain’t food. Veg is what food eats.

  5. nightfly »

    8 August 2016 · 4:02 pm


    Well, unless Toronto’s hockey media objects. Maybe a cross-promotion?

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