Dave Schuler (from Chicagoland) points out the following lessons of the Alabama special election:
1. Don’t chase after girls half your age.
2. Don’t even be open to the charge that you’ve chased 14 year old girls.
3. The bad or just dumb things you’ve done in the distant past can come back to haunt you, even if you’ve been given a pass on them for 30 years.
4. Don’t support a bad candidate for strategic reasons.
5. Don’t double down on your support for a bad candidate for strategic reasons.
6. There are some boundaries that shouldn’t be crossed even in presumably rock-solid states.
Anent item number two, Randy Newman says:
They say that money
Can’t buy love in this world
But it’ll get you a half-pound of cocaine
And a sixteen-year-old girl
And a great big long limousine
On a hot September night
Now that may not be love
But it’s all right
Newman wrote that at thirty-five, which strikes me as an age when you might take entirely too much interest in teenagers. Not that I’d know anything about that, of course.
The rule for robbing the cradle, as I learned it in the Deep South, was a minimum of half your age plus seven years. If your eye is on a 14-year-old girl, you need to be, um, at least 14. Damn math.