One topic covered at the most recent shrink session was the sad state of my dance card. I didn’t defend it, exactly, but I did, I believe, correctly identify the person responsible for this situation. (I carry his picture in my wallet.)
The next day, Robert Stacy McCain issued his own findings:
Overestimating your chances is a basic trait of losers. An unrealistically high self-appraisal — a misguided belief that you deserve better romantic partners than are actually available to you — is one obvious reason why people engage in online dating. And it evidently does not occur to these people that the online dating pool is polluted with people just like themselves, because another basic trait of losers is a lack of self-awareness. That is to say, the loser is seldom aware of why he is losing and, indeed, may refuse to recognize that he is a loser.
This is what produces guys like Elliot Rodger, who declared himself “The Supreme Gentleman” before his 2014 murder/suicide rampage. He was an extreme example of the loser mentality, a half-Malaysian guy who seemed to believe he deserved a perfect blonde girlfriend. He actually wasn’t bad-looking, and he was born to fortunate circumstances — his father is a film director — but he was doomed by his lack of self-awareness. All the feminist lectures about “misogyny” and “male entitlement” inspired by the Isla Vista shootings missed this point: If Elliot Rodger was typical of anything, he was a typical loser.
For the record, I have never had a blonde girlfriend, perfect or otherwise, and have never had any reason to expect I would get one.