Strange search-engine queries (648)

Welcome to Monday, to July, and to the second half of the year. Please have exact change. Comimg up: a sampling of the search strings that somehow lead to this site if you drill far enough, and these people evidently did.

geez its warm:  Yeah, July is like that. (Not available in Australia.)

the worst snowstorm ever:  No, July is not like that. (Perhaps in Australia.)

little kid sextube:  Um, we don’t do that here. Kids have it hard enough without having to deal with pervs.

transmission problems with a 1989 Ford Probe:  Issues with a nearly-30-year-old car? Do tell.

wells fargo credit card and 651 fico score:  And that’s why you’re driving a nearly-30-year-old car.

“void is life”:  That’s what happens with a nearly-30-year-old car, especially during rush hour.

puke green:  Of all the colors of bodily functions, this was the one you’d see most often in 1970s kitchens.

like germans:  Doesn’t everybody like Germans? I mean, this isn’t 1944
anymore.

waxing less frontal nudity:  Actually, in my experience, frontal nudity encourages at least some people to wax more.

fowl mouths:  It’s those goddamn ducks again, isn’t it?

the biggest problem hipster girl is that you’re just too intimidating in your good taste and vaguely-counterculture-but-not-threateningly-eccentric hotness for me to:  Even get it up anymore.

taco bell hiring:  My favorite spot for meeting intimidating hipster girls.

5 comments

  1. jsallison »

    2 July 2018 · 6:38 pm

    “puke green: Of all the colors of bodily functions, this was the one you’d see most often in 1970s kitchens.” Umm, pretty sure the technical term was ‘avocado’. Just sayin’.

  2. Dan T. »

    2 July 2018 · 7:00 pm

    Graffiti on the side of the lockers at the YMCA where I was taking swimming lessons in the 1970s declared the color of those lockers to be “puke green”; I don’t know what color name was used in the catalog of the paint vendor from which the lockers’ paint was obtained.

  3. CGHill »

    2 July 2018 · 9:01 pm

    Someone, maybe Pantone, needs to rule on the difference between Puke Green and Baby Shit Green. (There is also a Baby Shit Yellow.)

  4. Late Night With In The Mailbox: 07.02.18 : The Other McCain »

    3 July 2018 · 12:43 am

    […] Dustbury: Strange Search Engine Queries, also, Time Enough To Cry […]

  5. L. Beau Macaroni »

    4 July 2018 · 9:12 pm

    Complete this sentence:

    I found that __________________ intimidating.

    a. outlaw biker
    b. angry cop
    c. rabid wolverine
    d. calculus exam
    e. hipster girl
    As they sing on Sesame Street, “One of these things / Is not like the others…”

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