Strange search-engine queries (676)

Oh, damn. Is it Monday again? I guess I’d better start thumbing through the search strings again.

ragdoll achievement-wal hry:  Indeed; but truly, what have you achieved?

sophia loren sneezing dress:  She always seems to pick the right outfit.

j has an accidental death and dismemberment policy with a principal sum of $50,000. while trimming the hedges, j cuts off one of his fingers. what is the maximum j will receive from his policy?  Zero, because he’s now unable to fill out all the forms.

damn birds:  Someone who hasn’t seen Bird Box yet, I suspect.

you take a ring and then another ring and then another ring and then you’ve got three rings ballantine:  A lot of trouble to go to for a beer.

wrapped xerox yourself:  Same to you, pal.

we have been authorized by the governing body of the united nations (u.n) to compensate people which their profile are selected as one of the united nations models beneficiary:  So that murderous coup in [redacted] worked out for you, then.

adolescent naturists:  Should be encouraged, because otherwise they spend too much on clothes.

lara and her friends visit a new restaurant in town called betelgeuse. they just happen to notice it while on a long drive. lara and her friends like the ambience, d├ęcor, as well as the food. lara is surprised when she finds out that the restaurant has been open for two years and neither her friends nor she knew of it until that day. at which of the following aspects of marketing has betelgeuse failed?  Too short a name. It should have been “Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse.” Instant name recognition.

if a blighted urban neighborhood were to suddenly develop an assortment of upscale restaurants:  The long-time residents would resent the increased traffic.

female newsanchor who asked bob the weatherman where the eight inches were that he promised her:  Obviously a snow job.

wiener and still champion:  Probably not Bob the weatherman.

2 comments »

  1. hollyh »

    14 January 2019 · 8:03 am

    Nice work with Bob the weatherman.

  2. The Other McCain »

    15 January 2019 · 7:48 pm

    In The Mailbox: 01.14.19

    […] Dustbury: Strange Search Engine Queries, also, Here Endeth The Lesson […]

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