And by “we,” I mean the people who are supposed to be telling us about the weather:
A powerful “bomb cyclone” storm that’s expected to bring blizzard conditions to the high plains states has prompted a high wind advisory [Wednesday] for Springfield and southwest Missouri.
Spoiler alert: It is neither a bomb nor a cyclone, both of which mean different things, and cyclone is another meteorological phenomenon that serves as a poor metaphor for the rotation of a low pressure system. Also, bomb is a sudden explosion metaphor, and a low pressure system is not a sudden or fast thing.
Why not call it a regional coldnado?
Down here in Soonerland, we’d refer to it as “Wednesday.”
I am starting to get the sense that all the meteorologists are millennials whose life experience consists of reading contemporary reports of how nothing has ever been like this before.
And who are sworn to uphold the perverse belief that we must spend trillions of dollars to make sure nothing is ever like this again. Like that’s actually going to work anywhere but in bad fiction.