Moar power

Adventures with the Power Washer, starring Rob O’Hara:

After verifying that the bird’s nest was empty, I attached the super mamma jamma turbo nozzle to the wand, turned everything on, hit that nest with 2,000 PSI of water pressure and OOOH YEAH THAT MUDDER NESTER FLEW BABY! Again — would a $5 spray nozzle for our garden hose have cleaned up the nest? Maybe, but I’ll doubt it would have shot pieces 20′ into the air like this baby did.

While experimenting with the turbo nozzle I also blew paint off of one of Susan’s bird houses, and was able to blow leaves off of trees. So, yeah. The turbo nozzle has been retired. According to the manual, the turbo nozzle is only safe for cleaning concrete, brick, and masonry. I later shot the manual with the turbo nozzle and it destroyed it. UNLIMITED POWER!

Tim Allen would approve.

Next up was the orange (15°) tip. According to the manual, it is also approved for concrete and such, plus siding, gutters, fencing, decks, patios, lawn equipment, boats, and RVs. For every one of those surfaces it says “USE WITH CAUTION” but does a guy who would buy a 2,000 PSI power washer to remove a bird’s nest sound like someone who uses caution?

The main thing I wanted to see was if the orange nozzle would remove oil stains from the driveway, and the answer is … kind of. The stains were definitely lighter after spraying, but still obviously there. But a bigger problem arises when you start spraying your driveway. First of all, every concrete area you spray becomes super clean and white — which means all the areas you don’t spray stand out and look dirty. And second, for the thing to clean concrete you have to hold the wand pretty close to the ground, which gives a spray area of about a quarter. So if you want your entire driveway to be the same color at this point, bring a sandwich because you’re going to be there for a while.

I’m not entirely sure I could work the wand with one hand and hold a Schlotzsky’s with the other.


  1. fillyjonk »

    30 May 2019 · 6:49 pm

    Yeah, I remember using a power washer some years back when I painted my garage. They are quite….impressive. (I am holding back a joke about how men probably enjoy the power more than women do, given certain – ahem – anatomical similarities)

    I thought of using it to clean the siding on my house but it’s cheap old vinyl siding and I’m afraid I’d totally frag it.

  2. McGehee »

    30 May 2019 · 8:04 pm

    A pressure washer of my acquaintance stripped the bark off a tree, the paint off a porch railing, and some thickness off a fence slat before being relegated to cleaning the driveway. Carefully.

    Had we tried to use it to clean the sides of the house we were living in at the time, it probably would have blown shreds of vinyl halfway to Alabama.

  3. Jean »

    30 May 2019 · 11:02 pm

    The pressure isn’t adjustable? All or nothing?

  4. McGehee »

    31 May 2019 · 8:34 am

    Well, on ours, that was the lowest power.

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