Should I not have done that?

Usually you hear this right after “Was I wrong?” And the most likely answer is “Of course you were, you microcephalic dullard.” An example:

So I went to a car dealership and applied for an auto loan. My employer doesn’t provide paystubs so I faked them. I looked it up online and found out what I did was illegal so I called the dealership and immediately requested to cancel the loan request and told them I was no longer interested. I know this can cause some very bad issues and I was hoping someone might be able to tell me who I should contact to get ahead of this incase it gets flagged or anything like that. Thank you!!!

The first alarm goes off with “My employer doesn’t provide paystubs.” Even if they pay him in cash, they need to be able to furnish those stubs. And why would they pay him in cash? He’s either an independent contractor, in which case he’d get a regular invoice and, at the end of the tax year, some sort of 1099, or he and the boss are conspiring to avoid taxation, in which case they have other problems.

Alarm two: “…so I faked them.” Okay, he’s not getting a 1099.

Alarm three: “I looked it up online and found out what I did was illegal.” I’m guessing he found this out at NoShitSherlock.com. He certainly has no moral sense of his own. And if he gets a car and has a fender-bender, he probably won’t call his insurance company, because “they might raise my rates.” Maybe he’ll circumvent this by not buying insurance at all.

41 comments »

  1. Tom »

    3 September 2019 · 7:52 am

    …but he’ll also fake the insurance verification form just in case he’s pulled over and needs to produce it. Along with his driver’s license which he got from the “China guy.”

  2. McGehee »

    3 September 2019 · 11:48 am

    Makes me wonder why he tried to buy the dang car. Hasn’t Fagin taught him how to hotwire one yet?

  3. hollyh »

    5 September 2019 · 12:31 pm

    Announcement: Charles has had a car accident and is in the hospital. His daughter is there and more information will follow later.

  4. McGehee »

    5 September 2019 · 1:48 pm

    Thank you Holly for the heads-up.

  5. Jay »

    5 September 2019 · 2:27 pm

    Thank you Holly, we have all been concerned.
    And thank you for watching out for him, if I understand correctly.

  6. Brickmuppet »

    5 September 2019 · 7:27 pm

    Thanks for the update HollyH.

    Best wishes and hope for a speedy recovery.

    Please let us know if a GoFundMe or somesuch comes about.

  7. Scooby214 »

    5 September 2019 · 8:52 pm

    I’m very sad to hear about Charles’s car accident! I hope he has a speedy recovery. Be sure to let us know if there is a way we can help with his expenses.

  8. fillyjonk »

    6 September 2019 · 6:03 am

    All the good thoughts and hopes and prayers.

  9. Roger O Green »

    6 September 2019 · 10:48 am

    I wish him well.

  10. hollyh »

    6 September 2019 · 1:14 pm

    I will visit the hospital on Saturday to find out what I can, and will update you then.

  11. Jean »

    6 September 2019 · 1:58 pm

    Sending best wishes for a speedy recovery.

  12. McGehee »

    6 September 2019 · 3:39 pm

    Hoping for good news. Thanks again, Holly.

  13. Suburbanbanshee »

    7 September 2019 · 6:15 pm

    Oh, gosh! I hope everything is okay! Get better soon!

    I mean, I don’t want to throw around words like “a national treasure,” but Dustbury and its proprietor are truly treasures.

  14. Joe »

    8 September 2019 · 7:33 am

    Best wishes for a speedy recovery

  15. hollyh »

    8 September 2019 · 11:24 am

    Two of us went to the hospital last night, and I’m afraid the results are inconclusive. He was sedated, and no family members were there, so we couldn’t get information about his status. He was lying there in a neck brace. I think he will not be posting for a while.

    I will try to find out more, over the next few days.

  16. Jay »

    8 September 2019 · 12:09 pm

    Thank you, Holly. If you have a chance to speak with them, please let his family know that he, and everyone in his family, are in our prayers.

    If possible, could you post an address where we can send cards? I’m assuming even after sedation is removed, he will not be in front of a computer anytime soon.

  17. McGehee »

    8 September 2019 · 1:45 pm

    Holly, was the brace only around his neck, or was it one of those scaffoldy things that also holds the person’s head steady?

    If only his neck, that’s actually better than I feared after seeing Dan Lovejoy’s tweet.

  18. Dan Lovejoy »

    8 September 2019 · 6:39 pm

    I’m very sorry to report that Charles has died of his injuries.

  19. Scooby214 »

    8 September 2019 · 7:36 pm

    This is very sad news. Thank you for letting us know.

  20. Brickmuppet »

    8 September 2019 · 8:23 pm

    Damn.

    The world is a bit less quirky now.

    He will be missed.

    His family is in my prayers.

  21. Roger O Green »

    8 September 2019 · 8:24 pm

    McG – thanks for trying to keep me in the loop.

  22. McGehee »

    8 September 2019 · 9:55 pm

    Many of his loved ones went before, and his pain is behind him.

    Ours is just begun.

  23. Chris muir »

    9 September 2019 · 8:31 pm

    I miss you already, man.

  24. John Salmon »

    9 September 2019 · 8:34 pm

    RIP Chaz.

  25. Brett »

    9 September 2019 · 9:50 pm

    He linked to my work many times and I was always grateful. I am even more grateful that I had the impulse to thank him for it in the comments the last time he did so.

  26. Joe »

    10 September 2019 · 5:16 am

    RIP. you will be missed

  27. Roberta X »

    11 September 2019 · 6:51 am

    This is sad news. Charles was one of the good guys. I will miss him.

  28. Dan T. »

    11 September 2019 · 5:57 pm

    I knew him online since the FidoNet era, but never met him in person, but I’ll miss him a lot.

  29. Jeff Brokaw »

    12 September 2019 · 5:39 pm

    So sorry to hear about Chaz’ passing. He had a rough go these last few years… at least now that’s over. I’ll miss his blog too, so quirky and dependable. RIP Chaz.

  30. Joseph Hertzlinger »

    14 September 2019 · 8:46 pm

    Sigh.

  31. McGehee »

    22 September 2019 · 5:46 pm

    I’m having an unfrosted blueberry Pop-Tart in Charles’ honor.

  32. hollyh »

    25 September 2019 · 11:58 am

    McGehee: Good gesture. Someone told me they were planning a service but I have no details yet. I’ll see what I can find out.

  33. Roger O Green »

    25 September 2019 · 1:02 pm

    Holly – please post here. People ask me, and I have zero idea

  34. Roger O Green »

    26 September 2019 · 9:48 pm

    Becky wrote to me about the service Sunday, October, 20th

    If you’re on Facebook, IM me (Roger Owen Green) or email me at my blog rogerogreen.com

  35. McGehee »

    6 October 2019 · 3:28 pm

    I’ve realized I have no clue what Charles’ favorite charity (-ies) might be. Anybody know?

  36. Jan »

    7 October 2019 · 6:48 am

    I miss you, Charles. I think I’ve only commented here once or twice in the last decade, but you were one of my essential daily reads. I’m glad that all pain is ended for you, but it’s a slightly less bareable world without you. Rest In Peace.

    If no one knows his favorite charities, may I suggest something to do with spinal injuries? Appropriate perhaps.

  37. McGehee »

    7 October 2019 · 4:02 pm

    Good thought, Jan. I’d need to research the options to make sure the one I gave to was legitimate, but barring a known favorite of Charles’ that would do nicely.

  38. Roger O Green »

    11 October 2019 · 7:15 am

    I asked Becky, because someone asked me, about donations on Charles’ behalf: She said: “I have no idea. We haven’t found anything in reference to charitable organizations in his record-keeping. If anything, I would say OKC Performing Arts or maybe a Mental Health Organization.”

  39. McGehee »

    15 October 2019 · 9:27 am

    It would have been just like him to make charitable donations and not bother to claim them on his taxes. ISTR him saying he didn’t itemize.

  40. McGehee »

    15 October 2019 · 9:33 am

    Maybe the way to remember him, charity-wise — at least for those of us who do itemize — is to make at least one charitable donation in 2019 to any favorite cause of our own that we don’t claim on our own taxes.

    It may be as close as we ever get to acting in the same spirit that he did.

  41. Roger O Green »

    15 October 2019 · 9:14 pm

    I never itemized until I got married for the final time.

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